Are you a sex addict? Has the thought ever crossed your mind or has your partner ever mentioned it to you and you waved it off? Or maybe you are dating a sex addict and you are not aware of it. Okay, maybe you are a little bit aware but you are not sure.
Most people never connect addiction to sex! They don’t know whether the sex they are having is addictive or not. They just feel it is fun and should be had anytime, anywhere with anyone. People only see alcohol and drugs as addictive; sex is never on their list.
A lot of us like sex a lot and we are not shy to explore and experiment with different partners just to discover how much pleasure our bodies can handle or how fulfilling sex can be.
People have sex for various reasons ranging from curiosity to emotional connection to exploration then finally to sexual satisfaction. But do we know when it’s too much or where to draw the line? Is there even a limit?
It may come as a shock to you that there are people out there who are actually addicted to sex and they are not even aware of it. Let me put it this way “Yes, they know they have sex a lot but they don’t know they are addicted to it. Okay, some people are aware but they refuse to admit it.
Sex can be a drug too! Yep, Absolutely! Sex addiction is as powerful as any narcotic although it isn’t as common as alcoholism or drugs. But it is a very real problem that thousands of people are battling each day; even married people struggle with it.
WHO IS A SEX ADDICT?
According to Psychcentral, “Sexual addiction is best described as a progressive intimacy disorder characterized by compulsive sexual thoughts and acts.” A sex addict is someone who indulges in excessive sexual activity out of addiction. They are everywhere; in the school, workplace, in church and even in our homes.
They can’t help but crave sex every minute of the day. It’s like an obsession. They almost go crazy if they don’t get enough of it. Sex, to them, is like a hobby or a game. Eventually, the pursuit of sex becomes more important than family, career, and even personal health and safety.
10 SIGNS YOU ARE DATING A SEX ADDICT:
How do you know you’re dating a sex addict? Most sex addicts exhibit some obvious traits that are impossible to hide. Some of these traits are:
1. Watching Too Much Porn:
Some people watch porn occasionally while others watch it almost everyday. It is normal for some couples to watch porn. But when one partner seems obsessed with it that he hardly watches any other movie except porn, there is cause for worry.
Even when they make love to their partners, they still have the urge to watch porn and even masturbate. The need to view pornography is usually a precursor to masturbation. If your partner watches way too much porn, he can be classified as an addict.
2. Excessive Masturbation:
A sex addict usually has the compulsive need to masturbate every single day especially after viewing porn. The need becomes so overwhelming that the addict does not have the power to keep from masturbating. He does it out of obsession and proportion. If your boyfriend masturbates more than 2 times a day and is still not sexually satisfied, he is definitely on the addict list.
3. They are Never Sexually satisfied:
Sex addicts are usually hyperactive in bed. They have a very high sex drive and no matter how much sex they have everyday, it’s never enough. They always yearn for more. It’s like the more they have it, the more they want it. It’s just never enough! Does your partner crave more and more sex each time he has it? Does it seem like he never gets enough from you? That is one major sign of sex addiction.
4. Having More Than One Sex Partner:
Sex addicts are never sexually satisfied and because of that, they tend to have multiple sex partners. They feel having more sex partners will keep them occupied and satisfied. But that’s not always the case because they end up craving even more. Do you suspect your boyfriend has more than one sex partner? You maybe dating a sex addict…
5. They Daydream about Sex a lot:
Sex addicts often daydream about having sex with different people in different places. Does your partner think of sex all the time? Okay, you won’t have an answer to that. Does he seem to be lost in a world of sexual fantasy? Does he seem easily distracted or carried away in the middle of something important?
6. Lack of Self-Control:
Sex addicts often lack self control even when they are in a committed relationship. Because sex is their number one priority, everything else is always totally messed up. When they at work, they spend the majority of their time trying to get their colleague into bed. Once they succeed, they try to get the coffee girl into bed too. Even a client could be a potential bed mate. It’s an unending circle!
7. They Have Sex Everywhere:
Sex addicts often have no choice of location when it comes to sex. Because of their uncontrollable sex drive and lack of self control, they can have sex anywhere and everywhere without caring about being caught. Once the itch starts, the only cure is to have sex with anyone they can seduce.
8. They Can’t Stay Long Without Sex:
This is definitely one of my best points. Like I earlier said at the beginning of this post ” Sex addicts indulge in excessive sexual activity. They can’t help but crave sex every minute of the day. It’s like an obsession. They almost go crazy if they don’t get enough of it. Surely, they can’t stay long without sex and abstinence is like punishment to them.
9. They are Often Unfocused, Confused & Unstable:
Due to the amount of time spent daydreaming and having sex, they are rarely focused on the things that matter the most. Sex becomes their number one priority and everything else including friends, family & career usually goes to the bottom of their list.
Has your partner become unfocused, confused or unstable lately? Has he been repeatedly late to events or forgetful about important dates?
10. They Have Sex With Total Strangers:
A sex addict usually has no problem with making out with total strangers in a dark alley or a public toilet. In fact, it is a habit they can’t stop. One minute, they are seen drinking solo in a bar, the next minute, they are either going home with a total stranger or banging her in a dark corner. It’s really pathetic!
11. Having Bouts of Sexually Transmitted Infection:
Most sex addicts tend to have unprotected sex out of habit. When the urge comes, they get so carried away that protection never crosses their mind. At that point, all they seek is relief from the undying itch they feel. As a result of this careless behavior, they unknowingly pick up infections or diseases from total strangers.
12. Frequent Mood Swings and Depression:
Some sex addicts who are aware of their situation usually try to stop but it seems so difficult. Each time they find themselves in that pit of obsession, they feel powerless and hopeless. It feels like an overpowering spirit falls upon them.
When they realize what they’ve done, they feel guilty, ashamed and depressed. They really don’t want to hurt their loved ones but somehow they can’t help themselves.
All these are signs that a sex addict often exhibits unknowingly. If you notice your partner portraying at least 6 or 7 of these symptoms, chances are that you are definitely dating a sex addict.
Sex addiction is a sickness! Whether you admit it or not, it is. If you are dating someone who is possibly addicted to sex, advice him to seek treatment before it is too late. Don’t let sex addiction destroy your friendships, your career, your marriage and even your life. Visit a therapist and get help TODAY!