12 Actionable Tips To Find A Compatible Partner

How to find a compatible partner

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How can you find a compatible partner? Getting into a relationship is easy but finding a truly compatible partner is where the difficulty lies.

Long lasting relationships depend on compatibility, but the concept can be elusive. How do you know if you’re really compatible with someone?

Is love the only criteria for a successful relationship? What other ingredients do you need to grow a healthy relationship?

Love tests and dating sites promise to help you find your soulmate, but relationships are more complicated in the real world.

Your date’s profile may be a 100% match, but you can struggle to communicate with each other or work as a team. 

You may meet someone you’re crazily in love with but they’re missing most of the compatible qualities on your wish list.

The truth is, it takes effort and flexibility to nurture a relationship. Still, you’re more likely to succeed if you’re fundamentally compatible.

Use this list to make your romantic life more harmonious. I’ve divided the compatibility levels into three parts to help you find a compatible partner.

12 Actionable Tips To Find A Compatible Partner

How to find a compatible partner

Level 1: Compatible Values

When you’re looking for a compatible partner, values are a top priority because they shape your identity and guide your actions in a romantic relationship.

You’re more likely to grow in the same direction if you share similar beliefs and values. Here is how to find out if you share the same compatible values.

1. Make a list: How much do you know about your own values? Spend time thinking about what matters to you and how you define a meaningful life.

Your core values might include respect, kindness, integrity, and achievement but your partner may value honesty, transparency and generosity.

Make a list of your most important values and talk about it with your partner so you can know where you stand.

2. Express your needs: Sometimes we try to conceal what we need from a romantic relationship in order to seem more agreeable in the early days of dating.

But pretending to be someone you’re not is not going to result in a happy relationship. It will surely backfire when you get tired of putting on a mask.

Be fair to others and yourself by being honest from the start. Don’t pretend to be who you’re not. Try to be your real authentic self and your soulmate will love you for it.

3. Practice your faith: Interreligious marriages can work out when you find the right compatible partner for you.

However, it’s important for you and your partner to be able to respect each other’s commitments and feel authentic following your own path.

If you’re a Christian or a Catholic who wants to remain in the faith after marriage, communicate this to your partner to see if you’re on the same page.

If you find out you have different religions, try to see if you can work it out together before committing to a serious relationship.

4. Support each other: Your values will evolve and run into challenges in any relationship.

It doesn’t matter if your love originated from heaven; problems will surely arise.

Learn to support each other in good times and difficult moments. Working as a team and empathizing with each other can keep you united as a couple.

How to find a compatible partner

Level 2: Compatible Lifestyles

Couples who are happy in the long run tend to share similar lifestyles or hobbies with each other.

On a practical level, you’ll probably have fewer conflicts if you can accommodate each other’s daily routines without major compromises.

It’s important to observe each other’s lifestyle and daily habits to see if you can live together in peace without tearing your heads off.

5. Define your relationship: Are you hoping to get married or would you be happy living together long term?

Do you envision an equal partnership or another arrangement? Ensure that your relationship goals are aligned.

Misunderstandings usually occur when boundaries and goals haven’t been set in a romantic relationship.

Know what you want out of a relationship and communicate this with your partner from the beginning.

If you want to get a good first impression in the eyes of your partner, try to be honest and transparent from the onset.

Being open and communicative early on in a relationship can help you figure out if you’ll be compatible with each other in the long run.

If you want to get married in the future and he’s okay being single, your relationship won’t work out.

Make sure you talk about the future of your relationship from the beginning.

6. Discuss family planning: Do you want to have kids someday? What does your partner think about starting a family together?

This is a crucial topic that must be discussed in a relationship if you want it to work.

It will be difficult to stay together if there are major differences in your views about parenting.

What happens if you want three kids and he wants only two? Talk to your partner about having kids early on in the relationship to see if you’re compatible.

7. Talk about money: Do you want to find a compatible partner? Money should be one of the first things you discuss together.

The way you handle your finances will have a major impact on your future. Most couples who breakup always have an intimacy problem or financial crisis.

Before making a commitment to a serious relationship, share your financial history and your philosophy about spending, saving, and earning.

8. Speak up about your ambitions: Having a similar work ethic is an area that’s often overlooked. Talk about your ambitions, work life and career goals with your partner.

If you want to be a career lady and he prefers to be a solo entrepreneur, you both have to agree on it.

Otherwise, you might argue about who is lazy and who spends too much time at the office or at home.

9. Discuss house chores: Chores are often an issue for anyone living under the same roof.

Can you share responsibility and find a respectful middle ground if your cleaning standards are worlds apart?

Share your thoughts about keeping the house clean and divide the chores equally among you.

How to find a compatible partner

Level 3: Compatible Interests

Are different tastes in music really a deal breaker? You might want a partner who loves opera, or you may be able to work around that.

Decide which lifestyle aspects are the most important to you. Here are definite ways to find out if you’re compatible with your partner:

10. Spend time together: If you want to find a compatible partner, ask yourself what you’re trying to accomplish in that relationship.

Create time to explore and discover everything you can about each other. Engage in frequent dates to give you ample time to get to know yourselves well.

Enjoying the same activities can reinforce your friendship and create shared memories.

However, you can enjoy each other’s company even when you’re working on different projects.

11. Share goals: Achievements like raising money for charity or learning new dance steps can draw you closer together too. Find something you both can enjoy.

Are you passionate about pets or children? Invite your partner to join you on any volunteering project you’re working on.

You’ll easily bond if you share some passion goals together.

12. Have seperate friends: You’ll be happier and stronger as a couple if you maintain your connection with other family and friends.

It can be exhausting to rely on your spouse for all your needs. Share your opera subscription with a friend who loves it.

It’s okay to have seperate friends even when you’re in a relationship. Don’t be tied to the hip to your partner; learn to be independent and self-sufficient.

How to find a compatible partner


In any romantic relationship, it’s important to remember that you deserve love and happiness.

There are many singles who could be compatible partners for you if you clarify your expectations and keep an open mind.

If you want to find a compatible partner, use this list to find out where you match and other areas that need adjustment.

No relationship is 100% perfect. You only have to be willing to work at it as much as the other person.


Recommended Reading:

7 Obvious Signs You’re not Compatible with Your Partner

How to Get Him to Commit Even if He’s Scared of Commitment

7 Clear Signs You’re Compatible With Your Partner

About The Author

Jennifer Dagi

Jennifer Dagi is happily married to her best friend and the love of her life. As a relationship coach, she is passionate about helping couples build healthy and happy relationships.

She strongly believes communication and intimacy are important in building a successful relationship.

Join her on a fabulous journey to improve your love life one step at a time and don't forget to subscribe for weekly blog updates.

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