Most people enter a romantic relationship with the hope that it will last forever but this doesn’t always happen.
Due to several reasons, some relationships fail along the line and if you’re not aware of the cause of your breakup you may choose to play the blame game until you move on.
According to recent studies, about 40-50% of marriages end in divorce and lack of trust is among the top reasons for a broken relationship.
In this article, we look at some of the biggest reasons why relationships fail and how you can avoid them in your love life.
TOP 10 REASONS WHY RELATIONSHIPS FAIL
Are you wondering why your last relationship failed? It could be deeper than you thought.
If you’ve been looking for closure or clarity about a failed relationship, here are the top 10 reasons why relationships fail:
#1 Trust issues
One of the most common reasons why relationships fail nowadays is a lack of trust.
This is because trust is very important in maintaining a long-term relationship.
Couples who have a strong sense of trust feel more secure in their relationship and usually have a fulfilling love life.
However, people who have trust issues tend to suspect another person’s motives and this can hinder a good relationship from blossoming.
The truth is, there is no way you can have a lasting bond with your partner if you don’t trust each other completely.
The moment you begin to question the other person’s words, intentions, and actions, your relationship will start to crumble.
To have a successful relationship, couples must build trust from the beginning by being honest, transparent, and accountable to one another.
Research shows that cheating is another major cause of breakup and divorce among couples.
When someone enters into a romantic relationship, they expect their partner to be faithful to them and if they end up cheating, it can be a devastating experience.
If your significant other is unfaithful in a relationship you may feel betrayed and find it difficult to trust them again, which can make you drift apart.
While infidelity may not be avoidable, a couple can reduce the risk of cheating by using each other’s love language, engaging in physical intimacy often, and staying fully committed to each other.
Most people think that love is the only ingredient needed for a happy and successful relationship.
However, love alone is never enough to keep a couple together.
You also need to be compatible spiritually, emotionally, financially, and in the bedroom.
If one aspect is misaligned, it can be challenging to maintain a healthy love life.
When you discover that you’re compatible with someone in bed but your values/beliefs differ, you’ll struggle to meet each other halfway and you’ll always fight about what’s right or wrong.
Lack of compatibility among couples is another reason why relationships fail and this can be avoided if you take your time to choose a partner who has similar beliefs, values, and goals as you.
If you decide to settle down with someone you’re not compatible with, you’ll have a problem surviving in a long-term relationship.
#4 Poor communication skills
Good communication fosters a healthy relationship and it’s important that couples can talk to each other about anything.
If a couple only discusses the kids, shopping for groceries, or paying the bills, this is a sign that they’re not compatible with each other.
For a relationship to work, couples need to express their feelings openly, complain about what’s bothering them, and find a workable solution together.
When the reverse is the case in a relationship, it can be difficult for a couple to stay together because when they don’t communicate well, they won’t understand each other perfectly.
And lack of understanding can create a lot of problems in a romantic relationship.
If one partner is talking while the other person isn’t listening or acknowledging their concerns, they’ll feel unheard and unhappy.
#5 Lack of physical intimacy
Lovemaking is a vital part of an intimate relationship and it’s the glue that keeps a couple together.
Physical intimacy is the only thing that differentiates a romantic relationship from a friendship.
Sadly, a lot of factors can affect a couple’s love life from health challenges and low energy to a busy lifestyle.
And if one partner has a higher drive than the other, it can lead to an unsatisfactory relationship.
It’s essential to get married to a partner with whom they’re intimately compatible.
If you end up with someone who has a low desire for romance or is always uninterested in making love, the lack of physical intimacy can cause your relationship to fail.
#6 Lack of respect
Mutual respect is necessary for building a successful relationship with a romantic partner.
When a couple has respect in their relationship, they’ll treat each other nicely and communicate in a healthy way.
However, if one partner is hostile or disrespectful toward the other, the relationship can go downhill fast.
Lack of respect is another common reason why relationships fail; if you don’t respect someone, you’ll undervalue them and even take them for granted.
When you yell at your partner, mock them for making mistakes, or roll your eyes during an argument, they’ll feel hurt and gradually withdraw from you.
According to Dr. John Gottman, a renowned psychologist and marriage expert, contempt which is a form of disrespect is one of the biggest causes of divorce among married couples.
#7 Poor conflict-resolution skills
Another reason why relationships fail is that some couples lack the skills necessary to resolve conflicts healthily.
When a couple keeps fighting about the same things over and over again, they may think that their relationship doesn’t stand a chance and they may decide to break up.
Conflict is unavoidable in most relationships and when a couple isn’t prepared to navigate their differences, it can be challenging to stay together.
For instance, if you’re a short-tempered person who gets angry at little things, you should find a way to control your temper when having difficult conversations with your significant other.
If you don’t manage your emotions effectively, you can turn small problems into big issues that may not quickly go away and you find yourselves stuck in a vicious cycle.
It’s crucial to learn how to settle your issues without drama because if a conflict isn’t handled in the right way, it can blow out of proportion, which would lead to a failed relationship.
#8 Different relationship goals or life aspirations
Having different life goals or relationship desires is another reason why couples break up.
For example, if your partner is planning to relocate to another country to study while you want to stay close to your family and get married soon, it may be difficult for your relationship to work.
A romantic relationship can only succeed if a couple wants the same things in life or if they’re willing to compromise in some way.
When two people have conflicting priorities or goals, it can lead to a failed relationship because they’ll both want to chase what makes them happy and fulfilled.
And if nobody wants to make sacrifices for the other person, their relationship will suffer.
To avoid unpleasant surprises down the road, couples must talk about the future regularly and make life-changing decisions together.
#9 Unrealistic expectations
Complete acceptance of your partner and having realistic expectations are vital to the growth of a long-term relationship.
If you’re demanding too much from your partner or expecting them to change their personality to please you, it can create serious issues in your relationship.
And you’ll find yourselves arguing or fighting all the time in a bid to gain control of the situation.
To avoid feeling disappointed in a committed relationship, make sure to settle for someone you’re satisfied with and who accepts you completely.
When a couple allows each other to be free, they’ll express themselves openly without fear of criticism or judgment, which can lead to a healthy relationship.
#10 Financial problems
Money is an essential commodity that makes life easier for most people and when you don’t have enough, you’ll feel unhappy.
Financial strain can also create a lot of stress and anxiety in a romantic relationship.
Even though you love each other, if you’re not financially stable, you’ll constantly worry about money instead of focusing on improving your love life.
It could get worse if one person hides money or spends lavishly while the other partner is left to scramble just to get by.
Once a couple is not on the same page when it comes to finances, it can result in a breakup or divorce because they’ll struggle to maintain their emotional connection.
There are so many reasons why relationships don’t last and if you’re aware of them, you’ll be able to prevent them from occurring in your love life.
From lack of respect and incompatibility to trust issues, a lot of things can cause a couple to drift apart instead of getting closer in a relationship.
It’s important to choose someone who has the qualities you’re looking for in a life partner and to also talk about your needs often.
When you’re on the same page with your partner, it would be easier to navigate your differences, resolve conflicts quickly, and grow together as a couple.
About The Author
Jennifer Dagi is happily married to her best friend and the love of her life. As a relationship coach, she is passionate about helping couples build healthy and happy relationships.
She strongly believes communication and intimacy are important in building a successful relationship.
Join her on a fabulous journey to improve your love life one step at a time and don't forget to subscribe for weekly blog updates.