We all want that happily ever after, but sometimes we sabotage our relationships without realizing it. It even happens to the best of us.
Whether you’re a newlywed or you’ve been married for decades, there are some common pitfalls that can trip up even the most loving couples.
In this blog post, we look at some mistakes women make in marriage and how you can avoid them.
By knowing what to watch out for, you can keep your relationship strong and thriving.
9 COMMON MISTAKES WOMEN MAKE IN MARRIAGE
Do you ever feel like your marriage isn’t quite living up to those fairy tale expectations? You’re not alone.
Even the strongest relationships hit bumps along the way. As women, we often fall into certain patterns without even realizing it.
The good news is that by knowing where you fall short, you can do better and get your relationship back on track.
Here are 9 mistakes you might be making in your marriage and how to fix them.
1. Neglecting your partner’s needs
A common mistake women make in marriage is forgetting that their spouse needs them regularly.
It’s easy to get caught up in your own world, but neglecting your partner’s needs can slowly damage your relationship.
Take time to listen and understand what makes them tick. Are they feeling appreciated? Do they need more quality time or physical affection?
Don’t assume you know what they want—ask them directly! Everyone’s love language is different.
Maybe they’d love a surprise date night, or simply your undivided attention during dinner. Small gestures can make a big impact.
Remember to prioritize your partner’s needs alongside your own to create a more fulfilling partnership for both of you.
2. Trying to change your spouse
You fell in love with your partner for who they are, right? If you try to mold them into someone else, you’ll create a lot of problems in your marriage.
It’s a common mistake women make—thinking they can “fix” their spouse or change their core personality.
But here’s the truth: people don’t fundamentally change unless they want to.
Constantly criticizing or nagging your partner to be different will only breed resentment.
Instead of focusing on their flaws, try appreciating their positive qualities. Remember what drew you to them in the first place.
If there are behaviors that truly bother you, have an open, loving conversation about it.
But accept that you can’t force change—you can only control your own actions and responses.
A healthy marriage requires mutual acceptance and unwavering support, not attempts at transformation.
Embrace your differences and grow together, rather than trying to reshape each other.
3. Failing to communicate effectively
Communication is the lifeblood of any relationship, especially marriage. Yet, it’s an area where many women stumble.
You might think you’re expressing yourself clearly, but are you really?
Often, we fall into the trap of expecting our partners to read our minds or pick up on subtle hints. Newsflash: they can’t!
Instead of bottling up your feelings or dropping vague clues, try being direct and honest. Share your thoughts, needs, and concerns openly.
But remember, effective communication is a two-way street. It’s not just about talking; it’s about listening too.
Give your partner your full attention when they’re speaking, and try to understand their perspective.
Don’t shy away from difficult conversations too.
Addressing issues head-on can prevent small problems from snowballing into major conflicts. Always encourage open, respectful dialogue.
4. Letting resentment build up
A major mistake women make in marriage is not speaking up about their needs or what’s bothering them.
You know that feeling when your partner does something that bugs you, but you don’t say anything? That’s how resentment starts to creep in.
It’s like a tiny snowball that grows into an avalanche if left unchecked. Maybe he forgot your anniversary, or he never helps with the dishes.
Instead of addressing these issues head-on, you might find yourself stewing silently.
This bottled-up frustration can lead to passive-aggressive behavior or sudden outbursts.
Your partner isn’t a mind reader so learn to communicate openly.
When you refuse to speak up or express your feelings, you deny both of you the chance to work through problems together.
Open, honest dialogue is the key to preventing resentment from poisoning your relationship.
Don’t let small irritations fester into big problems—speak up and work it out together.
5. Prioritizing children over marriage
Many women love their kids so much that they neglect their spouses. Are you guilty of this?
It’s easy to pour all your energy into parenting, but maintaining a strong marital bond is crucial.
When you constantly put the children first, your partner may feel like an afterthought.
Try to carve out regular date nights or quiet moments together, even if it’s just 15 minutes a day to reconnect.
Make your relationship a priority by setting boundaries with the kids and protecting couple time.
You may want to spend much time with the kids and give them your undivided attention, but modeling a healthy marriage is one of the best gifts you can give your children.
Balancing parenthood and partnership isn’t easy, but it’s worth the effort. A strong marital foundation provides stability for the whole family.
So nurture your relationship alongside your parenting—it will lead to a happier life for everyone involved.
6. Not prioritizing intimacy
One of the biggest mistakes married women make is not making intimacy an important aspect of their marriage. If you’re doing this, you’re not alone.
Between work, kids, and a million other responsibilities, it’s easy for intimacy to take a backseat.
After a stressful day, the last thing you want is to get under the sheets with your spouse. But intimacy is the glue that holds a marriage together.
When you neglect it, you’re missing out on a powerful way to connect with your partner.
It’s not just about the physical act, either. Intimacy encompasses emotional closeness, vulnerability, and shared experiences.
By making time for romance and prioritizing couple time, you’re investing in your relationship’s longevity.
Don’t fall into the trap of thinking passionate lovemaking is just for newlyweds.
Regular physical intimacy can boost your mood, reduce stress, and even improve your overall health.
So, make it a priority—schedule date nights, try new things together, and keep that spark alive. Your marriage will blossom as a result.
7. Criticizing your husband all the time
Constant criticism can destroy a relationship if it happens repeatedly.
It’s easy to fall into the habit of pointing out every little thing your husband does wrong, from leaving dirty socks on the floor to forgetting to take out the trash.
But here’s the thing: nobody likes to feel like they’re always under scrutiny.
Instead of focusing on the negatives, try to praise your husband when you catch him doing something right. This positive reinforcement can work wonders for your relationship.
Remember, your partner is human and will make mistakes. Ask yourself if that small annoyance is really worth damaging your connection over.
If there are genuine issues that need addressing, approach them with kindness and understanding.
Don’t forget to frame your concerns as team problems to solve together, rather than attacks on your husband’s character.
10 Things You Should Never Say To Your Husband
8. Complaining to people about your marital problems
Another common mistake married women make is telling people the issues they are facing in marriage and expecting sympathy.
Do you ever feel tempted to vent about your spouse to friends or family? While it’s natural to seek support, airing your dirty laundry can damage your marriage.
When you complain to others, you’re inviting them to judge your partner and take sides. This can create tension and erode trust between you and your spouse.
Instead of complaining to other people, try these healthier alternatives:
• Talk directly to your partner about issues
• Seek professional counseling if needed
• Journal your feelings privately
Marriage is a sacred bond between two people. Don’t destroy what you’ve built by inviting other people into your private life.
By keeping conflicts within your relationship, you show respect for your partner and commitment to working things out together.
Save the venting for trivial matters, and address serious problems with your spouse or a qualified therapist.
9. Comparing your marriage to others
You’ve probably heard that comparison is the thief of joy, and this is especially true in marriage.
It’s tempting to scroll through social media, seeing picture-perfect couples and wondering why your relationship doesn’t measure up.
But it’s important to note that every marriage has its unique challenges and triumphs.
When you constantly compare your relationship to others, you’re setting unrealistic expectations.
Remember, what you see online or even in your friends’ relationships is often just the highlight reel.
By focusing on how your marriage stacks up against others, you’re missing out on appreciating the special moments and growth in your own relationship.
Instead of comparing, try celebrating the unique aspects of your marriage and focus on building a strong connection with your partner based on your shared values and experiences.
Conclusion
No relationship is perfect, and we all make mistakes.
The key to building a healthy relationship is to be aware of the issues mentioned above so you can avoid them or nip them in the bud.
A great marriage takes work from both partners. It’s about growing together, communicating openly, and choosing love every day.
Don’t be too hard on yourself if you recognize some of these mistakes—we’re all human!
The most important thing is to keep learning and improving. With some effort and commitment, you can build the strong, happy marriage you’ve always dreamed of.
Recommended reading:
9 Telltale Signs You’re In A Loveless Marriage