10 Signs A Married Man Will Never Leave His Wife For You

signs a married man will never leave his wife for you

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So you’ve been seeing a married man for a while now, and you’re starting to wonder if your relationship will ever get serious.

Even though he tells you he loves you and acts like you’re the only one for him, you suspect he’s just stringing you along.

If you’re looking for signs that he’ll leave his wife, look no further. This article will walk you through the telltale clues that your married lover is never going to make you his one and only.

Get ready to read between the lines of all his excuses and empty promises.

The truth may hurt, but it’s better than being deceived and strung along in an affair that’s going nowhere.

Keep reading to learn the signs a married man will never leave his wife for you.


Most married men never plan to leave their wives for a side chick.

They know where their commitment truly lies and will keep coming up with excuses and fake promises to make you stay.

If you’ve been dating a married man for some time and you’re hoping he’ll break up with his wife soon, here are clear signs he will never leave her for you.

1. He Avoids Discussing The Future

When a married man knows he won’t leave his wife for you, he avoids discussing any kind of future together.

He’s happy to keep things casual and undefined, not wanting to make commitments he can’t keep.

If you bring up where the relationship is heading or what you both want long-term, he changes the subject or makes excuses.

He’s staying in the present to avoid messy complications, even if it means stringing you along.

If after six months of dating, your married lover consistently avoids talking about long-term plans or changes the subject when it comes to the possibility of being together openly, it might indicate he doesn’t see a future with you.

A man who’s serious about building a life with you will make an effort to integrate you into his life in meaningful ways.

But if he’s holding back, it means he’s uncertain of what the future may bring and doesn’t want to lead you on.

When a married man refuses to commit to you in any official capacity, that’s a clear signal he’s staying put in his marriage.

He may make vague promises of a future together to keep you hoping but look at his actions, not words.

If he’s avoiding commitment after a reasonable time, his heart likely still lies with his wife.

signs a married man will never leave his wife for you

2. He’s Secretive About The Relationship

A major sign a married man will never leave his wife for you is that he hides you from the most important people in his life.

If he insists on keeping the relationship a secret and is not willing to introduce you to friends or family, it means he doesn’t want to commit to you.

When a man is serious about you, he wants to show you off, not keep you hidden in the shadows.

Maybe he says he’s “just not ready yet” or doesn’t want to “complicate things.” Don’t buy it.

The truth is, he’s stalling because he has no intention of leaving. If he really saw a future with you, his wife’s feelings wouldn’t matter.

But if he’s hiding your relationship, it’s obvious you don’t mean anything to him, and you’ll always be his side piece. 

His secrecy and lies will only continue to hurt you until you find the courage to walk away.

Staying in a secret relationship with a married man may seem exciting, but it rarely ends well.

You’re setting yourself up for heartbreak by investing your time and emotions into someone who can never fully commit to you.

The healthiest choice is to break it off, heal, and then look for available men who can give you their whole heart.

3. He Rarely Mentions His Wife Or Home Life

If the married man you’re seeing hardly ever talks about his wife or what goes on at home, that’s a sign he has no plans of leaving her for you.

Men who are serious about divorcing their spouse will share details about their unhappy home situation.

They’ll complain about their relationship troubles or talk about the struggles of living together.

A man who avoids these topics altogether is likely trying to compartmentalize his affair from the rest of his life.

He wants to keep you as a secret escape from his real-world responsibilities.

When he’s with you, he’d rather pretend his other life doesn’t exist. But as soon as he leaves, he goes right back to playing the role of a devoted husband.

This type of man wants to have his cake and eat it too. He enjoys the thrill of an affair but isn’t willing to give up the stability of his marriage.

As difficult as it is, don’t expect a man like this to ever fully commit to you.

When a man keeps his relationship with you completely separate from his marriage and never mentions his wife or home life, it means he has no plans to change his situation.

He’s made it clear through his actions that his wife and home life will always remain his top priority.

You deserve so much more than being someone’s temporary distraction from an unhappy marriage. Consider walking away from this relationship.

4. He Only Sees You On His Terms

Does your married lover reach out to you whenever it suits him? If he only makes time for you when it’s convenient for him, that’s a sign he’s not going to leave his wife.

His family and responsibilities come first, and you’re squeezed into the leftovers of his schedule.

Maybe he can only call you late at night or has strict rules about when you’re allowed to contact him.

When a man truly cares about you and sees a future together, he’ll make you a priority. He’ll text you good morning, call you on his lunch break, and plan regular dates.

If he’s constantly canceling plans at the last minute or not making any real time for you in his life, then you’re likely not at the top of his list.

A married man who’s seriously considering divorce will want to immerse himself in the relationship and spend as much time with you as possible.

If he’s unwilling to make sacrifices to see you and you feel like an afterthought, then he’s probably not planning to leave.

Don’t settle for a relationship where you constantly have to chase after a man and beg for scraps of his attention. You’re worth more than that.

signs a married man will never leave his wife for you

5. He Prioritizes His Wife Over You

A clear indication a married man will never leave his wife for you is that he consistently puts his spouse and family first.

If he frequently cancels plans with you at the last minute because his wife needs him, that’s a sign his wife is the priority.

Maybe he’s hesitant to go on vacations with you or only spends time with you when his wife is away.

When a man is seriously thinking of leaving his marriage, his attention starts shifting away from his wife and toward his mistress.

If he’s still at his wife’s beck and call, dropping everything for her, it means he’s not ready to make you the center of his world.

Don’t hold your breath waiting for the day he finally leaves her—chances are, that day may never come.

Accept that you’ll always come second to his wife. If you’re not okay with that, don’t pursue a relationship with a married man.

You deserve so much more than being someone’s mistress. There are single, available men out there who would make you their first choice and top priority.

6. He Makes Excuses And Fake Promises All The Time

Does your married lover make frequent excuses or empty promises about leaving his wife but hasn’t made any effort?

Chances are, he has no real intention of leaving and is simply stringing you along to keep you available when he wants.

If he’s constantly making excuses for why he hasn’t left yet—like waiting for the kids to graduate, financial difficulties, or not wanting to hurt his wife’s feelings, he’s likely stalling.

Leaving a marriage is a huge decision, and if he really loves you, he’ll do whatever it takes to be with you instead of cooking up stories.

Has your married lover been promising for months or even years that he’s “going to leave soon” but never actually does?

His sweet words are meaningless without follow-through. If he’s filling up your ears with empty pledges and pretty speeches, it means he’s not serious about you.

The hard truth is, if he really wanted to be with you, he would be. Don’t waste your time on a man who will never give you what you truly want and need.

Find a single man who will love you fully instead of treating you like a backup plan or second choice.

7. He Reassures You Without Taking Action

A big sign a married man will never leave his wife for you is that he promises to dissolve the marriage but never takes concrete steps to do so.

He says all the right things to keep you around without actually leaving his wife.

The truth is, promises of a future together, proclamations of his deep love for you, and apologies for having to sneak around are all excuses he uses to keep you on the hook.

Words are easy, but actions speak louder. If months or even years pass and he’s still not divorced or even taken steps to separate, that should tell you all you need to know.

He has no intention of actually leaving his wife for you, no matter what he says.

This type of man enjoys the thrill of the affair but also the stability of his marriage.

He gets to have his cake and eat it too, while you’re left with empty promises and a broken heart.

Don’t fall for his sweet talk and charm. If he wanted to be with you fully, he would be.

Save yourself the pain and end it now—staying will only cause you more heartache.

As hard as it will be, breaking up with your married lover is the only way to free yourself up to finding your ideal partner.

There is a man out there who will make you his priority and not keep you hidden in the shadows.

This married man is not that man, and no amount of convincing will make him change.

signs a married man will never leave his wife for you

8. He’s Content With The Way Things Are

A married man who’s willing to leave his wife for you will show genuine signs of discomfort with juggling a double life and will make plans to change the situation.

If the man you’re dating is content with maintaining the status quo, it means he has no plan to leave.

Let’s face it, ending a marriage is complicated and messy.

As long as he’s getting what he wants and needs from you without disrupting his home life, why would he want things to change?

You’re likely giving him an escape from his mundane routine and meeting emotional or physical needs that aren’t being fulfilled at home.

He gets to have his cake and eat it too. This type of setup is ideal for him, so don’t expect him to leave unless something forces his hand.

If he’s not actively taking steps to file for divorce and brushes off conversations about commitment or gets defensive if you pressure him, that’s a sign he’s satisfied with the current circumstances.

The hard truth is if he hasn’t left by now, he probably never will. Don’t waste years of your life hoping to build a future with a man who will never fully be yours.

Have the courage to walk away and find a loving partner who will give you their whole heart.

9. He Makes Minimal Effort To Change His Situation

When a married man genuinely cares for you and sees a future together, he will make efforts to change his situation.

For instance, he’ll actively work on separating from his wife, such as discussing divorce, consulting a lawyer, or arranging for a different living situation.

If he’s okay with stringing you along indefinitely without altering his circumstances, that’s a sign he’s never going to leave his wife.

Here are some indications he’s not willing to put in the effort to change his situation:

He makes excuses for why he can’t leave his marriage yet, like waiting for the kids to grow up or financial reasons, but takes no real steps to make it happen.

He avoids conversations about the future and gets defensive or changes the subject when you bring it up. A serious man will want to openly discuss relationship goals and next steps.

His life remains largely unchanged. He maintains the status quo and continues to split his time between you and his wife with no end in sight. A man ready to commit would start practically and emotionally untangling himself from his marriage.

He blames external factors for why he’s stuck, rather than taking responsibility for his own choices and actions. The truth is, where there’s a will, there’s a way. If leaving was a priority, he’d find a way to make it happen.

The bottom line is that you deserve a man who will make you a priority in his life.

Don’t settle for someone who keeps you dangling on the sidelines with lots of excuses and empty promises.

Look for a man who follows through on his word with action and commitment.

10. He Expresses Guilt Or Indecision About Your Relationship

A clear sign a married man is not serious about you is that he constantly talks about feeling guilty for betraying his wife and expresses uncertainty about leaving her for you.

If the man you’re seeing frequently talks about feeling guilty or seems torn about his actions, it’s a sign he’s not ready to make the significant decision to leave his marriage.

Watch out if he says things like:

“I feel awful for doing this behind her back.”

“I don’t know if I can go through with the divorce.”

“What we’re doing isn’t right.”

His indecision and regret demonstrate he’s unwilling to end his marriage.

If he’s still torn over choosing between you and his wife after several months or years, he probably never will.

He enjoys the comfort and security of his marriage too much to give it up, even if he cares for you.

Don’t expect his feelings to magically change or for him to suddenly find the courage to divorce his wife.

As long as he feels guilty about your relationship and is stuck between two women, you’ll never be his number one priority.

You’ll always be the “other woman” he runs to when it’s convenient for him nothing more.


If you’ve been dating a married man and hoping he’ll leave his wife for you, I’ve given you clear signs he will never leave her for you so you can know where you stand.

I know it’s hard to accept, but the handwriting is on the wall. Stop waiting for something that will never happen.

You deserve someone who can give you their whole heart and commit to a serious relationship with you.

The longer you hold on to a married man, the more you’ll get strung along and miss out on meeting an available guy who’ll love you wholeheartedly.

Don’t waste another second on an affair that’ll never lead to anything serious.

Walk away from that married man with grace and courage. Your perfect match will find you at the right time.


Recommended reading:

9 Reasons Why You Shouldn’t Date A Married Man

9 Warning Signs A Man Won’t Change For You

How To Move On From A Relationship

About The Author

Jennifer Dagi

Jennifer Dagi is happily married to her best friend and the love of her life.

As a relationship coach, she is passionate about helping couples build healthy and happy relationships.

She strongly believes communication and intimacy are the most important ingredients for building a successful relationship.

Join her on a fabulous journey to improve your love life one step at a time and don't forget to subscribe for weekly blog updates.

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