A lot of people get into romantic relationships for what they can get from it, not because they want to build something authentic with someone else.
And it can be difficult to differentiate between serious partners who genuinely love you and those who are with you for personal gain.
So, how can you tell when someone is faking their love for you?
When you’re in a fake relationship, you’ll notice a lot of warning signs if you closely observe your partner’s words, actions, and body language.
In this article, we look at some of the major signs of a fake relationship that most people mistake for real love.
10 OBVIOUS SIGNS YOU’RE IN A FAKE RELATIONSHIP
One of the most common signs of a fake relationship is excessive public displays of affection in a bid to show off.
Typically, couples in a real relationship are more focused on improving their love lives rather than doing things to impress other people.
If you suspect that your romantic partner is faking their love and affection for you, here are 10 obvious signs you’re in a fake relationship.
1. You don’t share any emotional intimacy with your partner
A major sign of a fake relationship is emotional detachment in one or both partners.
Couples in real romantic relationships are usually emotionally connected to each other.
This means they’ll speak one another’s love language, engage in shared hobbies together, and use endearing words to express their love.
However, when you’re in a fake relationship, you may not feel any emotional connection to your partner and you’ll interact with each other as roommates or business partners.
If your romantic partner is emotionally distant, cold, or aloof toward you, this is a sign of a toxic relationship.
Someone who truly loves you will do little things to make you feel happy, loved, and appreciated.
2. Your communication is always shallow
Good communication is the key to maintaining a healthy relationship and nurturing your bond as a couple.
A major sign of a fake relationship is that you rarely engage in deep, meaningful conversations with your partner.
Couples who have shallow conversations either have nothing in common to talk about or they’re not being vulnerable and honest with each other.
When you’re in an authentic relationship, you’ll want to know your partner on a deep level, which means you’ll ask personal questions and openly share your thoughts.
Do you notice that you never discuss anything serious or deep with your significant other?
Maybe you talk about the weather or an upcoming event but you never dive into topics like spirituality, personal values, and intimacy.
If you’re unable to communicate openly with your partner, there is a high chance that you’re in an unhealthy relationship.
3. Your relationship is centered around money, fun, or intimacy
Most fake relationships are based on the pretense of true love when they’re hoping to gain something valuable from the other person, such as money, physical intimacy, or entertainment.
Typically, when you’re in a loving relationship, you’ll both invest your time and attention to make it work and it won’t feel one-sided or exploitative.
However, if you’re with the wrong person, you’ll observe that there’s an absence of real romance and an increase in superficiality.
Another big sign you’re in a fake relationship is when your partner showers you with lots of affection only when they want something from you.
If the only thing you and your partner have in common is body chemistry or an extravagant lifestyle, that’s a huge red flag.
Real relationships are built on a solid foundation of true love, shared values, and deep emotional intimacy.
4. You don’t spend quality time as a couple
When you’re dating the right person, you’ll notice a genuine willingness on their part to connect with you emotionally and build something long-term.
One big sign you’re in a loveless relationship is that your significant other will choose to spend most of their time with their close friends or family members.
This is because they desperately want to avoid connecting with you on a deep level.
A romantic partner who wants to get to know you better and bond with you intimately will jump at any opportunity to spend time with you.
If you notice that your partner comes up with a lot of excuses to avoid being around you, that’s a sign that you’re in a fake relationship.
5. You don’t talk about the future together
A key factor in having a successful and long-term relationship with someone is the ability to make future plans together.
This means you’ll talk about your life goals, create plans that accommodate both of your needs, and make decisions as a team.
However, if you’re in a relationship with a fake person who’s pretending to love you, they’ll avoid talking about the future because they’re not planning to stay for the long haul.
As soon as you’re no longer useful to them, they’ll find someone else to meet their needs.
If you observe that your significant other changes the subject whenever you bring up discussions about the future, this is a sign that they’re not ready to love you for real.
6. Your partner doesn’t support you in any way
Some of the notable characteristics of a healthy relationship include genuine love, mutual respect, and emotional support.
Having a helping hand and a shoulder to lean on is very important to your personal growth because you’ll go through hard times in life at some point.
And the best person to stand by you during challenging moments is your significant other.
A huge sign you’re dating a fake person is that they won’t support you mentally, financially, or emotionally and you’ll often have to deal with your problems by yourself.
If your partner is only concerned with their own welfare and regularly asks for your help to tackle some problems but never reciprocates your kind gestures, they’re not in love with you.
Someone who doesn’t offer any assistance in your time of need is obviously not a genuine person and they’re with you simply because they consider it useful.
7. Your partner doesn’t invite you to attend social gatherings with them
Another common sign you’re with someone who is faking their love for you is that they’ll often insist on spending time alone.
Sure, everyone needs to enjoy some alone time regularly. But when you’re in a romantic relationship, you have to prioritize your partner’s needs too.
Does it seem as if your partner is hiding you from their friends and family? Or do they seem to want a lot of space and privacy all the time?
They may be doing this because they’re not proud to be seen with you in public or they don’t care for your companionship.
A partner who doesn’t love you will avoid inviting you to social outings and even when they do, it’s for the sole purpose of flaunting you around like a trophy not because they love your company.
If you realize that your significant other is giving you arm’s length and ignoring you most of the time, this is a big sign that they’re faking their love for you.
8. Your partner shows you affection in public but ignores you in private
A universal sign that shows couples are in love is that they’ll be super affectionate with each other.
Of course, this doesn’t mean that they’ll make out in public but they’ll show subtle signs of true love such as holding hands, kissing tenderly, and laughing when they’re together.
Fake love, on the other hand, is based on pretense and the need to impress others rather than fostering an emotional bond with someone who means the world to you.
When you’re in a fake relationship, you’ll notice that your romantic partner only shows you love and affection when other people are present.
For example, your partner may post about you on social media to let everyone know that they have someone special in their life, but they’ll refuse to be affectionate or romantic toward you when you’re alone.
Or they’ll smile lovingly and play with you when you attend an event that involves a lot of their acquaintances but when you’re at home together, they’ll behave as if you don’t exist anymore.
This is a sure sign that they’re pretending to love you for their own selfish reasons not because they want to build a long-lasting relationship with you.
9. You don’t feel like you’re an important part of their life
A huge indicator of being in a healthy relationship with someone who values you is that you’ll feel a sense of belonging like you’re an indispensable part of their life.
However, when you’re with a fake person, there is no assurance of security or stability.
In fact, you’ll often wonder what you mean to your partner and whether your relationship is headed in the right direction at all.
Someone who is faking their love for you will not show any concern for your physical health or mental well-being and you’ll often be left alone to deal with all your issues.
The only time they’ll pay attention to you is when they want to ask for a favor or put you on display to impress their inner circle.
This type of partner is usually unavailable when you need them the most and they’ll show little or no empathy when you’re going through hard times.
They’ll also be unwilling to compromise and make sacrifices whenever you disagree on something because they’re only looking out for themselves.
If you feel unloved, neglected, and unappreciated most of the time, that’s an obvious sign you’re in a fake relationship.
10. Your partner throws tantrums for silly reasons
Have you noticed that your partner seems nicer to other people while being cranky and irritated with you for little or no reason?
They may be pretending to love you just to get their needs met.
Real love is patient, kind, and understanding not mean, impatient, and manipulative.
A big sign of a fake relationship is that you’ll experience a lot of drama, criticism, and toxicity because your partner can’t stand you.
Plus, they don’t care if they hurt your feelings or negatively impact your mental health.
So they’ll start an argument over the littlest things that don’t really matter and get mad at you for making small mistakes.
For instance, if you forget to do something, they’ll criticize you and call you names instead of trying to understand your situation.
Of course, it’s okay if your partner gets upset or angry when you offend them but attacking your personality and verbally abusing you is not real love.
A partner who genuinely loves you will listen when you talk and be gentle with you when you’re not on your best behavior.
They’ll also sympathize with you when you’re experiencing challenges in life and be willing to support you to become the best version of yourself.
There are so many fake relationship signs that tell you that your partner doesn’t love you and if you’re attentive enough, you’ll discover them early.
From being emotionally detached and not spending quality time with you to engaging in excessive PDA, it’s often easy to detect fake love in a romantic relationship.
Normally, fake people only stay with you when they can get something valuable from you and they’re not interested in investing their love, time, and affection without some reward.
In fact, they’re skilled at keeping transactional and one-sided relationships that benefit them immensely.
Fake people only know how to take but can never give anything substantial in return and they’ll only leave when you outlive your usefulness.
So what do you do when you find out your significant other is pretending to love you?
If you discover that you’re the only one putting in extra effort to improve your love life, you have two life-changing choices to make.
You can choose to stay and work on rebuilding the foundation of your relationship or you can decide to end the relationship and find a better partner.
The most important thing is that you make the right decision for yourself.
A person who isn’t willing to love you wholeheartedly doesn’t deserve your loyalty and devotion.
According to a research study, staying in an unhappy relationship can have negative ramifications on your mental health and emotional well-being.
It’s wise to quit the relationship before you commit to it deeply.
Even though it will hurt to accept that your significant other hasn’t been authentic all along, breaking up with them will help you move on faster and enable you to create space for a more reliable partner.
About The Author
Jennifer Dagi is happily married to her best friend and the love of her life.
As a relationship coach, she is passionate about helping couples build healthy and happy relationships.
She strongly believes communication and intimacy are the most important ingredients for building a successful relationship.
Join her on a fabulous journey to improve your love life one step at a time and don't forget to subscribe for weekly blog updates.