Are you struggling to heal after a breakup?
Whether you ended the relationship or your partner did, breakups hurt and healing can be difficult.
Maybe your life has been turned upside down and now you’re wondering how to move on from here.
If it makes you feel better, know that you’re not alone.
Many people have been through difficult breakups and the good news is that they healed, moved on with their lives, and found their forever love.
While breakups can be tough, there are several things you can do to feel better and move forward.
8 THINGS TO DO AFTER A BREAKUP TO FEEL BETTER
The pain of a breakup can sometimes be excruciating.
Even though your mind knows you have to forget your ex, your heart just can’t get over the experience.
If you’re still hurting, here are some things to do after a breakup to feel better.
1. Allow yourself to grieve the loss of the relationship
The first step to feeling better after a breakup is to acknowledge your feelings rather than trying to suppress them.
The end of a relationship is painful, so give yourself time to mourn what you’ve lost. It’s okay to feel sad and grieve what you once had.
Cry if you need to, look through old photos, or do whatever helps you process the grief. Bottling it up will only make you feel worse later on.
Take time off from work or school if possible and be gentle with yourself. Reach out to close friends or family members and let them support you.
Talking about the relationship and breakup can help you work through complex emotions.
While it may be tempting to dwell on what went wrong, also remember the good times you shared.
The relationship was meaningful, and it’s normal to feel a sense of loss. Honor what you had by acknowledging the joy and growth it brought to your life.
When you’re ready, start to shift your mindset to the future.
The end of this relationship opens you up to new beginnings and opportunities for happiness in the future.
Though it may not seem that way now, you will heal and find love again when the time is right.
For today, be kind to yourself. That’s the most important thing you can do.
2. Remove all emotional triggers
A relationship breakup is hard, but it’s a chance to begin anew and rediscover yourself. Start by removing reminders of your ex.
Go through your place and get rid of anything that triggers emotional memories.
Throw away their gifts, photos, clothes – whatever stirs up feelings of sadness or regret needs to go.
Next, unfollow them on social media. Seeing their posts will only make you dwell on the past and stall the moving-on process.
You should also avoid places you frequented as a couple. Take a break from that favorite date night restaurant or the park where you shared many walks.
Exploring new spots helps you forge new memories that don’t involve your ex.
It’s not easy, but removing emotional triggers helps shift your mindset to focus on yourself again.
Take it day by day, practice regular self-care, and keep busy with hobbies or friends.
With time, the painful reminders will fade, leaving space for you to rediscover who you are.
3. Limit contact with your ex
The temptation to stay in touch may be strong but try to limit contact with your ex as much as possible after a breakup.
Staying in close contact can make it harder to heal and move on.
If you’re still in love with your ex, create a significant distance between you until you’re in a better place. Here are a few things to try:
• Don’t call or text them unless necessary. Give yourself space to process the end of the relationship.
• Hide or delete their number from your phone to avoid drunk dialing or messaging them in a moment of weakness.
• Unfriend or unfollow them on social media. Constantly seeing their posts and updates will keep you stuck in the past and delay your healing.
• If you do run into them in person, be polite but keep things brief. There’s no need to rehash what went wrong or try to reconnect. Wish them well and continue on your way.
Giving yourself physical and emotional distance from an ex is one of the kindest things you can do for yourself after a breakup.
Use the space to reflect on the relationship, learn from your mistakes, and make a fresh start.
The pain will fade, and you’ll gain a new perspective to build a happier and healthier life.
4. Lean on your support system
Loneliness is one of the most difficult feelings people struggle with after a relationship ends.
You don’t have to go through a breakup alone to prove that you are strong, and talking about your feelings can be therapeutic.
Lean on friends and family who care about you. After a breakup, their support can make a world of difference in helping you heal and feel better.
Call up a friend and ask if they want to grab coffee or lunch.
Talking to someone who loves and supports you can lift your mood and ease feelings of sadness or loneliness.
Anytime you need to talk or just need a shoulder to cry on, reach out to your loved ones and let them comfort you. Their support can help heal your heart.
Don’t bottle up your emotions. Be open with your friends and family about how the breakup is truly making you feel.
Talking about your feelings is a healthy way to start the healing process. Your loved ones will appreciate your honesty and want to support you in any way they can.
The end of a relationship is hard, but surrounding yourself with people who care about you can help you mend your broken heart.
No matter strong you feel you are, let others be there for you in their own little way—that’s what good friends and family are for.
5. Focus on self-care and pamper yourself
After a relationship ends, it’s the best time to engage in soothing activities. Do things that make you feel good and increase your confidence.
Give yourself some extra TLC. Take a bubble bath, get a massage, or do a DIY spa treatment.
Light some scented candles, put on calming music, and unwind. Your mind, body, and soul will feel refreshed.
Exercise is also a great way to release pent-up emotions and improve your mood.
Go for a walk or jog, do some yoga, or just get outside for some fresh air and vitamin D.
Any activity that gets your blood pumping will help clear your head and ease anxiety or sadness.
Remember to eat a balanced diet, stay hydrated, and get enough sleep too.
Pampering yourself in small ways and making self-care a priority will help you heal.
Be gentle with yourself and focus on the relationships and activities that boost your confidence.
Healing after a breakup is a journey, so take your time and appreciate each small step forward.
6. Pick up old hobbies or try new ones
Picking up old hobbies or trying new ones is a great way to rediscover yourself after a breakup.
Whether it’s reading, writing, painting, or something else, these activities can distract you from negative thoughts and bring you joy.
When you’re in a relationship, you tend to pick up new interests or drop certain activities to spend more time with your partner.
Now that you have more free time, revisit those old hobbies you used to love or try something completely new. Here are some ideas for you:
• Read some books. Curl up on the couch or in bed and get lost in a fiction novel. Reading is a perfect solo activity that exercises your mind and sparks your imagination.
• Start a DIY project. Do you have an idea for redecorating your place that you never had time for?
Now is the perfect time to start. Keep yourself busy with a creative task like woodworking, painting, or gardening.
• Learn to cook. Improve your cooking skills or try making dishes you’ve never attempted before.
Cooking is a useful life skill and making a meal from scratch can be rewarding. You can even invite friends over to enjoy your homemade meals.
• Travel domestically. If finances allow, take a short trip to a new city or state you’ve always wanted to visit.
Traveling, even for just a weekend, exposes you to new experiences and environments that can shift your perspective.
Rediscovering hobbies and interests you used to enjoy gives you a chance to reconnect with yourself.
Trying new activities exposes you to more opportunities for growth and learning which can help to build your confidence.
Make a list of things that spark your curiosity and start experimenting. You’ll gain a stronger sense of self and purpose to help you move on to better things.
7. Look inward and reflect on what you want next
Now that you’ve gone through the initial shock and pain of the breakup, it’s time to turn inward.
Reflecting on what you truly want next will help you start to heal and move forward.
Identify what you want in your next relationship. Think about the good and bad of your past relationship.
What qualities are must-haves in a future partner? What are your dealbreakers?
Be specific and write them down. This will give you clarity and help guide you to healthier relationships.
The end of a relationship is also a good time to focus on your needs and desires. Put aside what your ex or family expects of you.
What do you want for yourself? Do you want to change your career, take up a hobby, or travel around the world?
Make a list of things that light you up inside and start doing them regularly!
It’s also important to learn from your mistakes. Everyone makes mistakes in life so you’re not a failure for not getting it right the first time.
Look at where things went wrong in your past relationship and figure out how you can grow from it.
Then, forgive yourself for the role you played in the breakup. Beating yourself up will only make you feel worse. The past is done; today is a chance to start fresh.
Looking within and discovering what you want empowers you. You’ll gain clarity on the kind of life and partners you deserve.
Each lesson and experience whether good or bad, shapes who you are as an individual.
A breakup is simply an opportunity to rebuild yourself into someone stronger, wiser, and ready to find true happiness again.
8. Seek help from a mental health professional
Sometimes moving on from a failed relationship can be challenging.
Seeking help from a mental health professional like a therapist or counselor can help you work through the emotional turmoil of a breakup.
Here are some benefits of speaking with a professional:
• They can provide an outside, unbiased perspective. Friends and family mean well but may lack the objectivity a professional can offer.
• They are trained to help you deal with overwhelming emotions. The end of a relationship involves both grief over the loss of your partner as well as the loss of hopes and dreams for the future. A professional can guide you through the grieving process.
• They can offer coping strategies tailored to your needs. A therapist can give you tools to help you feel better each day, whether it’s managing anxiety, improving your mood, communicating better, or setting healthy boundaries.
• They provide a safe space for you to open up. Speaking with a therapist is confidential. You can share openly without fear of judgment or criticism. This can be enormously helpful after a breakup.
Seeking counseling does not mean there is something “wrong” with you or that you can’t heal on your own.
But professional support can help you recover from a breakup more healthily and constructively.
Don’t hesitate to ask others for recommendations or check with your insurance provider for options covered under your plan.
Your emotional health and well-being are worth the investment.
The journey to healing and rediscovering yourself after a breakup can be difficult.
Take some time to reconnect with who you are and what makes you happy. Do small things each day that boost your confidence and self-esteem.
Make new memories to help the old ones fade. Learn something new or pick up an old hobby to stimulate your mind.
Spend time with supportive friends and family who love and appreciate you. Most of all, be gentle with yourself during this process.
Breakups are hard, but focusing on self-care and personal growth will help you heal and find yourself again.
About The Author
Jennifer Dagi is happily married to her best friend and the love of her life.
As a relationship coach, she is passionate about helping couples build healthy and happy relationships.
She strongly believes communication and intimacy are the most important ingredients for building a successful relationship.
Join her on a fabulous journey to improve your love life one step at a time and don't forget to subscribe for weekly blog updates.