9 Reasons Why Married Men Like To Date Single Women

reasons why married men like to date single women

In today’s world, it’s easier than ever for married men to connect with singles, thanks to dating apps and social media platforms.

It almost seems normal for a married man to have a side chick but adultery is a risky business that can destroy a happy marriage.

This article will explore the reasons married men chase single women, so you can get an insight into what makes husbands stray from their wives.


Marriage is a sacred institution that requires a strong commitment from two people, so why do married men flirt and cheat with other women?

There are many reasons people choose to stray in romantic relationships. Here are some common reasons why married men like to date single women:

1. Married men crave the excitement and novelty that single women provide

Dating a single woman outside of marriage provides a sense of excitement and adventure that might be missing in a marital relationship.

For many married men, the chase and pursuit is half the fun. Single women represent a novel challenge—an exciting “game” to play.

The thrill of trying to attract and seduce someone new taps into primal instincts. It’s invigorating in a way that a long-term relationship can’t replicate.

A big part of the appeal is the sense of freshness and unpredictability that comes with dating someone for the first time.

Single women are an unknown territory, full of surprises and a mystery to uncover. This stands in stark contrast to the familiar patterns and routines of married life.

Chasing single women allows married men to reawaken the feelings of desire, lust, and passion that may have faded in their marriage over time. 

Experiencing these intense emotions again can be intoxicating—scratching an itch their wife no longer seems to.

There’s also an ego boost that comes from being actively pursued and desired by a new partner. It reaffirms feelings of attractiveness and desirability.

For men who feel their self-worth has slipped, dating single women can be an ego-validating experience.

reasons why married men like to date single women

2. Lack of intimacy and affection in the marriage

Physical intimacy and affection are fundamental human needs. When those needs aren’t being met in a marriage, it can create a deep void and resentment.

You start feeling emotionally disconnected and unfulfilled. If a marriage lacks intimacy, passion, or affection a married man might look for these things in a single woman.

For a lot of couples, the passion and intimacy slowly fade away over the years due to work stress, kids, health issues, and household responsibilities which leave little time or energy for romance.

It’s not unusual for a married man to suddenly find himself in a loveless marriage with little or no intimacy. Deep down, he craves intimate connection and desire.

It’s not just about getting under the sheets— he misses the affection, the feeling of being desired and attractive to his partner.

An affair with someone new can make him feel alive again like he’s getting that spark back that’s missing at home.

Sometimes, infidelity is a misguided way of trying to force change in the relationship.

It’s a cry for help, a wake-up call that something is seriously wrong that needs to be addressed.

The wiser choice is open communication and relationship counseling if needed.

But when those needs go unmet for too long, some married men will seek affection elsewhere.

3. They get an ego boost and validation from chasing younger women

Another reason why married men like to date single women is because they are suffering from low self-esteem and need something different to increase their confidence.

For married men, getting attention from an attractive younger woman can be an incredible ego boost. It reaffirms their desirability and masculinity.

After years or decades of being with the same partner, having someone new fawn over them makes them feel desired and wanted again.

Many men feel insecure as they age and no longer get the same admiring glances they once did.

An energetic young woman actively pursuing them helps combat feelings of “being too old”. Her interest strokes their fragile male egos in a deeply validating way.

There’s an undeniable appeal to the energetic zest and enthusiasm of youth. Married men crave to recapture that vigor and passion in their lives.

An attentive younger woman represents a rejuvenating spark that makes them feel alive and desirable once more.

4. Boredom and monotony of married life

When you’ve been married for years, the spark and excitement can fizzle out leaving you bored.

You engage in the same type of intimate activity every night, experiment with 2-3 positions, and always do it in the bedroom. This can create a sense of boredom and monotony.

As humans, we crave novelty and adventure. The prospect of something new and exciting can be intoxicating, especially when we don’t get it in our marriage.

Single women represent that tantalizing opportunity to recapture the rush of new romance.

For most married men, dating a single woman offers a temporary escape from the pressures and responsibilities of marriage.

It’s a chance to step outside the confines of their daily life and indulge in a fantasy world, however fleeting.

reasons why married men like to date single women

5. Midlife crisis or self-discovery

Some men go through a phase of questioning their identity, choices, and desires, leading them to seek new experiences and connections.

This midlife crisis can make married men feel adrift and lose their sense of purpose.

As responsibilities shift and the kids move out, they feel prompted to seek passion and purpose elsewhere.

They may view dating single women as a journey of self-discovery after years of being a husband, father, and provider.

The excitement of new connections rekindles parts of their identity that may have gone dormant.

6. Unmet needs

A major reason why married men chase after single women is because their most important needs are not being met in their marriage.

Unfulfilled emotional, physical, or intellectual needs in a marriage could drive a married man to seek fulfillment outside the relationship.

Many married men have illicit affairs with other women when their emotional needs go unmet.

Mismatched libidos are also a common issue in long-term relationships.

Seeking satisfaction elsewhere becomes tempting when intimacy needs aren’t fulfilled at home.

For men who feel overlooked or unappreciated in their marriage, the validation of being desired by younger women boosts their fragile egos.

The attention and flattery from someone new reminds them they’ve “still got it.”

While understandable, cheating carries immense risks. Open communication and counseling could help address unmet needs more constructively within the marriage.

7. Married men seek emotional connection with single women

Men aren’t always the best at expressing emotions. For some married guys, it’s easier to open up emotionally to a single woman.

She’s a fresh face without preconceived notions. There’s less baggage and history compared to the marital relationship.

A married man can be his authentic, vulnerable self without fear of judgment or consequences.

The single woman also provides a sanctuary where he feels truly heard and understood on a deeper level.

For some men, marriage means suppressing parts of their identity to “be a husband.”

With a single woman, he can resurrect the free-spirited, spontaneous guy he once was. She doesn’t carry expectations about who he “should” be.

He can indulge different interests, revert to old hobbies, or simply act younger without disappointing anyone.

If there are communication or emotional gaps in his marriage, a married man might seek a connection with a single woman who offers understanding, empathy, and emotional support.

Ultimately, an affair provides a safe space to explore and express sides of himself that may have been suppressed in the marriage.

reasons why married men like to date single women

8. Single women provide an escape from routine

Going to work, coming home, maybe going out once in a while with their wives can feel mundane for many married men.

They eventually get bored of the same old routine and chase after younger women who can add an exciting spark to their lives.

Most single women live vastly different lives than married people. They have their own friend circles, hobbies, and lifestyles.

Getting to be a part of that, even briefly, gives a married man a window into another world—one with fewer responsibilities and more spontaneity.

Their carefree, independent nature can be invigorating for a man who’s bogged down by obligations.

This is especially true if they’ve lost touch with who they are underneath the husband/father roles.

A fling with a single lady allows a married man to discover new aspects of his personality.

She’ll bring out sides of him that he never knew he had or hasn’t seen in years. For a little while, he gets to escape the confines of his marital identity.

9. Married men cheat because they have a desire for change

The desire for change, variety, or a fresh start can drive some men to seek relationships outside their marriage.

Dating a single woman gives them a chance to recapture those youthful feelings and rekindle passion.

Marriage often comes with compromises and sacrifices that can feel constraining for most people. Some husbands yearn to shed those shackles, if only temporarily.

A fling with an unattached woman allows them to break free from marital expectations and societal norms without any strings attached.

When he’s with another woman, he feels like a different person and can do whatever he wants without feeling immature.

For many married men who still love their wives, having an affair is simply a way to change up their daily routine and try something new.


If you’ve been wondering why married men chase single women, now you know.

Whether it’s to fill an emotional void, spice up their love life, or live out a fantasy, their motivations aren’t always as innocent as they seem.

Of course, you have complete control over your own choices.

But being aware of their motivations can help you make better decisions for yourself moving forward.

Married men can certainly be tempting, but they come with a lot of baggage.

At the end of the day, you should choose someone who can give you their whole heart, not just play part-time lover.


Recommended reading:

9 Reasons Why You Shouldn’t Date A Married Man

10 Harsh Facts About Dating A Married Man

10 Signs A Married Man Will Never Leave His Wife For You

About The Author

Jennifer Dagi
 | Blog

Jennifer Dagi is happily married to her best friend and the love of her life.

As a relationship coach, she is passionate about helping couples build healthy and happy relationships.

She strongly believes communication and intimacy are the most important ingredients for building a successful relationship.

Join her on a fabulous journey to improve your love life one step at a time and don't forget to subscribe for weekly blog updates.

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