You’ve found yourself falling for a married man. You know it’s wrong, but you can’t stop thinking about him.
Every time you’re together, the chemistry is undeniable. He makes you feel things you’ve never felt before.
But does he feel the same way? Is this just a fling or could it be something real?
You need to know if he’s really in love with you too before you get in too deep. How do you tell if a married man truly loves you?
There are some subtle signs you can watch out for. If you see these, it’s a good indication he has strong feelings for you.
But you have to be careful not to see things that aren’t there.
This article will walk you through how to spot the signs a married man loves you, so you can decide if your relationship has a future.
12 SURE SIGNS A MARRIED MAN LOVES YOU
If you’re in love with a married man and want to know if he’s serious about you, watch out for the following signs:
1. He makes an effort to spend time with you
Making significant efforts to spend time with you, plan activities together, or create shared memories can be a sign that a married man values your presence and wants to deepen your relationship.
If he’s finding excuses to see you more often, that’s a sign he’s really into you.
Maybe he’s offering to help you out with chores or errands so you have an opportunity to connect.
Or he’s cooking you dinner at your place when his wife is out of town. Spending quality time with you signifies that he loves being around you.
A married man in love will want to spend as much time as possible with you. He’ll call and text frequently to stay in constant contact.
He’ll make plans to get away for secret meetups and lavish you with affection and gifts when you’re together.
If he’s willing to take big risks to steal extra moments with you, it shows where his heart truly lies.
Of course, there’s always a chance he could still be playing you, so keep your eyes open for any lies or inconsistencies in his stories. Love may be blind, but you don’t have to be.
2. He opens up to you emotionally
If a married man confides in you about personal matters and seeks your emotional support, it could indicate that he’s falling in love with you.
Has he started sharing his hopes, dreams, and insecurities with you? That’s a sure sign he’s developing deep feelings. Men typically only open up to those they truly care about.
Maybe he’s told you about his difficult relationship with his parents or his worries about his career. Perhaps he’s confessed feelings of self-doubt or inadequacy.
These kinds of personal disclosures show how much he trusts you and values your support.
If he’s confiding in you and sharing intimate details about his life, it’s an indication that he sees you as someone he can open up to without judgment.
Of course, the more he shares, the more you share in return. This reciprocal vulnerability creates an emotional intimacy unique to romantic relationships.
Before you know it, you’ve established an unspoken connection and understanding of each other.
While a married man may not always be able to act on his feelings, his emotional intimacy with you reveals the strength of his affection and care.
His desire to share his authentic self is a meaningful gesture that signals you’re someone special in his life.
3. He introduces you to his inner circle
When a married man loves you, he’ll want to introduce you to the people closest to him.
These are the friends and family he trusts the most and values their opinions.
Introducing you to them is a big step and a sign he sees you as someone important in his life.
He’ll invite you to join him when he meets up with lifelong friends, or ask you to attend family events like barbecues, birthday parties, or other celebrations.
At first, he may introduce you casually as a “friend” or avoid labeling the relationship at all.
But over time, as his feelings grow deeper, he’ll get more serious and honest with those closest to him about the role you play in his life.
Meeting the people who matter most to him, and seeing him in the familiar environment of close friends and family, gives you a glimpse into another side of him.
Pay attention to how he acts around them, and how they respond to you.
Their reaction and opinions may provide insight into how committed and invested he really is in building a genuine future together.
While it can feel risky, this openness and willingness to integrate you into areas of his life that were previously separate is a meaningful gesture.
It suggests you’ve become someone worth sharing, worth building a life around—despite the complications. You’re more than just a secret or fling, you’re becoming a priority.
4. He talks about leaving his wife
Has he mentioned divorce or separation from his wife? If a married man is truly in love with you, he may start talking about leaving his wife to be with you.
He’ll say things like, “I wish I had met you first,” or “My marriage is over, I just haven’t told her yet.”
Of course, talk is cheap, so don’t take these declarations at face value right away. He has to actually follow through and take steps to end his marriage before you can believe what he’s saying.
A married man who’s talking about leaving his wife to be with you may just be having conflicting feelings.
Unless he takes real steps to end things with his spouse, these are likely empty promises meant to string you along.
So watch his actions, not his words. That will reveal if his love and devotion are real or not.
The truth is, some men get caught up in the thrill of an affair and make big promises they have no intention of keeping.
Be observant to see what he does next. If after several months he’s still making excuses about why he hasn’t left yet, it may be time to call his bluff.
5. He prioritizes you over his family
One of the biggest signs a married man loves you is that he prioritizes your needs and goes out of his way to make you feel special or cared for.
If a married man continually makes time for you even when he should be with his family, it’s a sign he’s fallen for you. His wife and kids come second now that you’re in the picture.
He’ll cancel plans with them to see you or spend hours on the phone with you when he’s home with them.
You’ve become his top priority, and his family responsibilities take a backseat. At first glance, this might seem exciting or flattering, but it’s not a healthy dynamic.
A man who so easily neglects his family for a new lover may do the same thing to you down the line.
As much as you may care for him, think about whether you want to be with someone who could avoid responsibilities and hurt others in this way.
You deserve someone who will put you first, but not at the expense of their core obligations to the people who depend on them.
This behavior reveals a lot about his character and values. If family is supposed to come before all else, what does it say that he’s willing to push them aside for you?
Love may feel blind, but in this case, try to see the situation as clearly as possible.
6. He discusses his family problems with you
When a married man loves you, he will open up to you about issues in his personal life, especially problems with his wife or family.
He may complain about lack of intimacy or affection at home, or vent about arguments and tensions.
While discussing relationship problems with a friend of the opposite gender can be normal, the frequency and depth of these conversations may signal he’s becoming emotionally dependent on you to fill certain needs.
Here are some signs to watch out for:
• He frequently calls or texts you right after a fight with his spouse to get your opinion or just to make himself feel better by talking to you.
• He shares very private details about his marriage or family life that make you uncomfortable.
• His complaints about his marriage seem to be escalating over time, rather than being resolved.
• He relies on you as his main confidant and support system, rather than turning to close friends or a counselor.
If the married man in your life is exhibiting these behaviors, it may indicate he’s becoming attached in an unhealthy way.
Be very cautious, as this can lead to an emotional affair and damage both your friendship as well as his marriage.
7. He’s physically affectionate with you
Another sign a married man is in love with you is that he can’t keep his hands off you.
When you’re together, he’ll find subtle ways to touch you, like brushing against you when you pass by or giving you a hug that lingers a few seconds too long.
He may cuddle with you in bed and play with your hair or gently stroke your face when you’re talking.
These intimate touches are his way of connecting with you physically and showing you how he feels without saying the words.
Be careful though, the thrill of a secret romance will make these fleeting moments of physical affection intensely passionate and emotionally charged so you might confuse lust for love.
Watch out for tender caresses and longing looks—these are all signs that he has deep feelings for you despite his marital status.
8. He’s jealous and protective of you
A married man in love may show signs of jealousy when other men pay attention to you because he wants to make sure no one else steals your affection.
This jealousy is a sign he cares deeply about you and worries about losing you.
He may also be overly protective. For example, he’ll insist on walking you to your car or waiting until you’re inside your place before leaving.
He’s doing this because he wants to defend you from potential harm. While a bit overbearing, his protectiveness reveals how much he worries about your safety and well-being.
His jealousy and protectiveness stem from strong feelings he has for you that he can’t express outright.
Since he’s married, he fears acting openly on these emotions. So he finds other ways to show he cares, like acting as your protector and defender.
These behaviors may feel stifling at times, but try viewing them as hidden expressions of his affection.
If a married man shows signs of jealousy when you interact with other people or expresses protectiveness over you, it could suggest that he has strong feelings for you and wants to assert his presence in your life.
Don’t get carried away though. If his behavior gets out of hand, have an honest conversation about finding the right balance between his protectiveness and your need for independence.
9. He includes you in his future plans
When a married man is serious about you, he’ll start including you in his future plans and goals.
He may talk about places he wants to travel with you, experiences you can share together, or even future events you’ll attend as a couple.
If he’s inviting you to weddings, family vacations, or work trips in the coming months or making plans for what you’ll be doing together next year, it’s a sign he sees you as a priority in his life for the long run.
Of course, this could be tricky if his wife doesn’t know about you yet.
But if he’s willing to take the risk of getting caught or creating tension at home by including you in meaningful future plans, it demonstrates he values your role in his life and wants you by his side for years to come.
This type of long-term thinking and planning is a key indicator that his feelings for you run deep.
Casual flings usually don’t extend into the distant future or impact major life commitments.
So if he’s making room for you in his future, there’s a good chance you’ve found a permanent place in his heart as well.
Watch out for conversations about the future, shared goals, or long-term aspirations that involve you.
These could indicate that he sees you as a significant part of his life and envisions a future together.
10. He professes his love for you all the time
Is the married man in your life announcing his love for you at every chance he gets?
Maybe he tells you he loves you in person, over the phone, in messages and emails.
Perhaps he says you’re the one for him and he wants to spend the rest of his life with you.
While the constant affection and compliments may make you feel special, be wary. Words are easy, but actions are hard.
If he truly loved you, he would make you a priority in his life and find a way to legitimately be with you.
Rather than showering you with “I love you,” he would show you through his deeds and life choices.
A married man who’s deeply in love would make plans to build a future with you, not just steal moments here and there.
He would be open and honest with you, not hide you from the rest of his world. Think about whether his expressions of love match his behavior.
Do his actions back up his words? If not, his profession of love may just be a way to keep you by his side when it’s convenient for him.
11. He celebrates special occasions with you
If a married man loves you, he’ll want to spend important days with you.
For instance, he’ll take you out for a nice dinner on your birthday or surprise you with flowers on Valentine’s Day.
He may also send a heartfelt card or romantic text message to wish you a happy anniversary of the day you first met.
These gestures show he’s thinking of you, even when you’re apart, and values celebrating milestones together.
While he likely can’t be with you for every little occasion due to his marital commitments, the ones that really matter to you will be priorities for him too and he’ll want to make you feel special.
The time you do share, whether over a homemade meal or stargazing in the park, will feel particularly meaningful.
You’ll notice his eyes light up at the chance to clink glasses in a toast to you and the joy you bring to his life.
Though his circumstances are complicated, his feelings for you are genuine.
He seizes any opportunity to shower you with affection and make memories that will last until the next time you meet.
The love and care put into even small details let you know you’re always on his mind and in his heart.
12. He’s actively working on separating from his wife
A big sign a married man loves you is that he’ll show it through his actions.
For example, he’ll start taking steps to separate from his wife so he can be with you openly.
This means he’s filing for divorce or legal separation, or at least making concrete plans to do so.
He won’t just talk about leaving his wife, he’ll actually do it. You’ll notice he spends less and less time at home, stays out later and later, and starts moving some of his things out.
Don’t believe a married man who says he’ll leave his wife but never actually follows through. Empty promises mean nothing.
Real love means sacrifice and commitment. If he’s willing to go through the difficult process of ending his marriage to make you a permanent part of his life, that shows how deep his feelings for you are.
Of course, this is a complicated situation, so make sure you go into it with realistic expectations. Ending a marriage is rarely easy or painless.
But if he’s actively working to separate, that’s a sign he’s willing to do what it takes to be with you legitimately.
His love for you is driving him to take this monumental step, rather than just keeping you as a secret on the side. That kind of dedication and follow-through speaks volumes.
Conclusion
While it’s impossible to read another person’s mind, there are some telltale signs a married man has feelings for you.
From wanting to spend a lot of time with you to talking about his marital problems and making concrete plans to leave his wife, a married man will show his love through actions.
Just remember to proceed with caution and keep your expectations low. An affair with a married man rarely ends well.
If you value your dignity and well-being, it’s usually best to avoid romantic entanglements with unavailable men.
You deserve to be someone’s one and only. Why settle for stolen moments and a relationship shrouded in secrecy and shame?
You’re worth so much more than that. Walk away with your head held high and never look back.
Even if he tells you he loves you, it doesn’t mean he’s going to leave his wife for you.
Don’t waste your precious time waiting and hoping for something that’s likely never going to happen.
Find a good man who’s single and ready to commit to you instead of investing your love and energy in a secret affair. You’re worth so much more!
Recommended reading:
10 Clear Signs He Doesn’t Want To Lose You
10 Signs A Married Man Will Never Leave His Wife For You
9 Reasons Why You Shouldn’t Date A Married Man
About The Author
Jennifer Dagi
Jennifer Dagi is happily married to her best friend and the love of her life.
As a relationship coach, she is passionate about helping couples build healthy and happy relationships.
She strongly believes communication and intimacy are the most important ingredients for building a successful relationship.
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