9 Signs You’re Forcing A Relationship With Someone

Signs you're forcing a relationship with someone

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Are you settling for a relationship that no longer feels right, just because you’re afraid to be alone?

Do you find yourself constantly making excuses for your partner’s behavior or going the extra mile to convince yourself that they are the one for you?

If so, you may be forcing a relationship that may not work in the long run. Forcing someone to love you will only lead to resentment, hurt, and wasted time.

It’s time to be honest with yourself about whether the relationship is right for you. Watch out for the telltale signs you’re forcing a relationship with someone:

1. You’re trying too hard to make it work

When a relationship feels forced, it’s usually because you’re putting in way more effort than your partner.

If you find yourself constantly making sacrifices for them, rearranging your schedule to accommodate theirs, or walking on eggshells so they don’t get upset, that’s not a good sign.

A healthy relationship should make you feel happy and fulfilled, not drained or insecure.

Don’t bend over backward for someone who wouldn’t do the same for you. You deserve so much better than that!

Rather than trying to change them or force the relationship into something it’s not, accept what is and move on.

There are caring people out there who will reciprocate your effort and affection without you having to ask.

Save your energy for finding an authentic connection where both partners’ needs are being met freely and joyfully.

Life is too short to waste time forcing relationships that aren’t right for you.

Let go of what’s no longer meant to be and make space for relationships where you can simply be yourself.

2. You keep overlooking the red flags

Another sign you’re forcing a relationship with someone is that you keep making excuses for them and ignoring their shortcomings.

For example, when your partner consistently forgets important dates in your relationship, you conclude that they are too busy.

If they always find faults in what you do and criticize you harshly, you think it’s because they know better than you.

Even when they break their promises over and over again, you wave it off because you don’t want to look like an ungrateful person.

Ignoring or dismissing significant red flags in your relationship is a clear sign that you may be forcing it.

If you’re experiencing abusive behavior, lack of trust, or consistent disrespect, you shouldn’t overlook these red flags.

Pay attention to how they treat you. Do they make you feel respected, supported, and cared for? Or do their actions show a lack of consideration and empathy?

A good partner tries their best to make you feel safe and loved. They’ll often go out of their way to make you comfortable when you’re around them.

If you feel unsafe in your relationship and sense that something is off, consider walking away.

Signs you're forcing a relationship with someone

3. Your intuition is telling you something’s off

Your intuition is your inner compass, and when it comes to your love life, it will steer you right. If your gut is telling you something’s not quite right, pay attention!

Your intuition sends little signals when something’s amiss. Do you feel anxious around your partner or dread the next time you’ll meet?

Do you find yourself questioning if you’re really happy or if the relationship is right for you?

Take note of these feelings – your intuition is trying to tell you something important!

Here are other signs your inner voice is trying to tell you the relationship isn’t meant to be:

You feel anxious or upset more often than not. A healthy relationship should make you feel safe and secure.

You’re constantly questioning whether or not your partner is right for you. Doubt is normal, but if it’s a recurring theme, it’s worth paying attention to.

You feel like you have to change major parts of yourself to please your partner.

There’s little to no physical or emotional intimacy. Intimacy is the glue that holds a relationship together. Without it, you’re just friends or roommates.

You’re staying together out of guilt, obligation, or fear of hurting your partner’s feelings. That’s not a good enough reason!

Forcing a relationship that isn’t meant to be will only lead to heartache and wasted time.

It’s always better to accept what your intuition is telling you, even if it’s hard, and choose to find a relationship where you feel happy and at ease.

Trust in yourself and have the courage to make the right choice for your happiness.

Forcing relationships never ends well, but following your intuition will lead you to your ideal partner when the time is right.

4. You find yourself making excuses for their behavior

When you’re forcing a relationship to work that really shouldn’t, you’ll catch yourself making excuses for your partner’s less-than-ideal behavior.

You’ll say things like “Oh he’s just stressed from work, that’s why he snapped at me” or “She didn’t mean to not call me back for 3 days, she’s just busy”.

In a healthy relationship, you don’t need to make excuses. You accept the other person as they are without justification.

If you find yourself repeatedly explaining their actions to friends or family (or yourself), that’s a sign the relationship isn’t meant to be.

The truth is, you deserve to be with someone who treats you well and makes you feel good about yourself.

Don’t settle for less by making excuses for someone who doesn’t show you the love, respect, and care you need. You’re worth more than that!

It’s better to be single than to stay stuck in an unfulfilling relationship where you have to constantly defend the other person’s behavior.

Walk away from the excuses and choose to put your happiness first. The right person for you won’t require so much justification.

They’ll treat you in a way that leaves no doubt you’re cared for and respected. Don’t force something that isn’t meant to be!

5. You’ve lost touch with your needs and wants

You know the relationship isn’t right for you when you realize you’ve completely lost sight of your own needs and desires. Watch out if:

• Your interests take a backseat: If what used to excite you now bores you to tears, but you go along with it to please your partner, that’s not a good sign.

While compromise is key, if you’re constantly sacrificing what you want to do, that’s a sign things have gotten out of balance.

• You feel unimportant: In a healthy relationship, both partners make the other feel valued and cared for. If you feel like an afterthought or that your needs don’t matter, it’s time for a serious conversation.

Explain how their actions (or lack thereof) make you feel and give specific examples. If things don’t improve, you may need to reevaluate the relationship.

• You’re not being your authentic self: The real you has gone into hiding to appease your partner. But suppressing your personality to keep the peace will only make you resentful in the long run.

Have the courage to speak up about what matters to you. If they can’t accept you for who you are, this relationship may not be meant to last.

If you’ve lost your sense of self, that’s not a good sign. The best relationships allow both partners to grow as individuals.

If you’ve given up hobbies, friends, or personal goals to please them, that’s a red flag you’re forcing it to work at your own expense.

The key to being happy in a relationship is finding the right match—someone who appreciates you for who you are, gives as much as they take and makes you feel like a priority.

Don’t settle for less. You deserve to be in a healthy relationship where you can thrive as your best self.

Signs you're forcing a relationship with someone

6. You know you’re not compatible with each other

A major sign you’re with the wrong person is that you just can’t seem to connect on a deeper level.

While romantic relationships require work, they shouldn’t feel like you’re running on a treadmill.

If you’re forcing a connection with your partner, it may be time to reconsider the relationship. Here are other signs you’re not compatible with each other:

Your interests and values don’t align

Do you have a hard time engaging in conversations or finding shared interests as a couple? The foundation of a healthy relationship is built on mutual understanding and support.

If your core beliefs and priorities in life are very different, you’ll always feel like you’re compromising yourself to make the other person happy.

You’re not physically or emotionally attracted to your partner

While attraction fades over time in any relationship, you should still feel excited to see your partner! If you have little desire to be intimate or affectionate with them, it’s a big red flag.

Forcing physical or emotional intimacy when it’s not there will only lead to resentment in the long run.

You’re settling out of fear or obligation

Staying in an unfulfilling relationship out of fear of being alone or hurting your partner’s feelings isn’t fair to either of you.

Have an honest conversation about your feelings, as difficult as it may be. Forcing a relationship that you know isn’t working will only lead to unhappiness for you both down the road.

If you and your partner have fundamental differences in values, goals, or lifestyles that cannot be resolved, it may indicate that you’re trying to force a relationship.

Ignoring these incompatibilities can lead to ongoing conflicts and dissatisfaction.

Follow your instincts and don’t stay in a relationship just because it seems like the thing to do.

7. There’s no emotional connection between you

Emotional intimacy and connection are vital for a fulfilling love life.

When there’s no real emotional connection between you and your partner, it can be a sign you’re forcing the relationship.

Do you find yourself thinking – Do I even care how their day was? Does what excites or annoys them even matter to me anymore?

If you have to force yourself to show interest in the details of their life, that’s not a good sign.

Additionally, if your partner behaves as if they’re doing you a favor by communicating with you or spending time with you, it could mean that you’re forcing the relationship.

A good relationship means genuinely caring for your partner’s well-being. You should feel joy in their happiness and sorrow in their struggles.

If you’ve lost that emotional bond and can’t seem to get it back, you may need to consider ending the relationship.

Sometimes we outgrow relationships or simply grow apart. The important thing is recognizing that things have changed and having an honest conversation with compassion.

Staying in an unfulfilling relationship will only make you both increasingly unhappy and resentful over time.

Though it may be difficult, ending things on good terms and transitioning to a platonic friendship or going your separate ways can open you both up to find more compatible partners where the emotional connection comes naturally.

Every relationship has ups and downs, but if you’ve truly lost that loving feeling, it’s better for both of you to accept it and move forward.

Signs you're forcing a relationship with someone

8. You constantly feel unhappy or unfulfilled in the relationship

A major sign you’re forcing the relationship is that when you’re with your partner, you frequently feel sad, anxious, or just plain bored.

The excitement you once felt has vanished, conversations seem dull or forced and intimacy feels like a chore. This is a major sign the relationship has run its course.

Rather than uplifting you, being together brings you down. Your needs and desires seem to always come second.

You find yourself wishing for the freedom of your single days or dreaming about someone new who can make you happy.

Healthy relationships should make you feel good about yourself and bring more joy than stress.

If you frequently feel upset, tense, or afraid of your partner’s reaction, it may be time for some honest reflection.

What changes would make you feel good in the relationship again? Have you truly communicated your needs to your partner?

If you’ve tried and still don’t feel heard or cared for, you owe it to yourself to consider moving on to find fulfillment and happiness elsewhere.

9. You feel obligated or pressured to stay in the relationship

If you find yourself dreading interactions with your partner or feel anxious at the thought of commitment, this could be a sign you’re forcing the relationship.

Ask yourself if you’re staying out of guilt, fear of being alone, or because you feel you “should”. Search your heart and be honest with yourself.

You may also need to discuss with your partner about where you’re at and what you both want.

However, if after trying your best you still don’t feel happy, it may be time to let go so you can both find more fulfilling connections.

Forcing a relationship that isn’t right for you will only lead to resentment and hurt in the long run.

If you feel obligated or pressured to stay in a relationship due to external factors such as societal expectations, fear of being alone, or financial dependency, it’s a sign you’re with the wrong person.

A healthy relationship should be based on love, mutual respect, and a genuine desire to be together. Have the courage to make the choice that feels right for you.


When you’re forcing a relationship, you’ll see the signs even though you may choose to ignore them.

Love should feel light and natural, not tedious or stressful. In a healthy relationship, couples give and take freely and enjoy sharing experiences.

If you’re the only one giving in or you rarely do fun things together anymore, you could be trying too hard to sustain something that isn’t meant to be.

Have an open, honest conversation with your partner about your concerns.

Try to compromise where you can and see if you’re able to reconnect with each other.

But if after trying your best you still feel unhappy and unfulfilled, don’t feel bad for walking away.

It may be difficult to leave, but staying in a forced relationship will only make you both miserable in the long run.

As hard as it is, it’s better to let go so you can both find more compatible and fulfilling partners.


Recommended reading:

9 Signs You’re Giving Too Much In A Relationship

10 Telltale Signs You’re In A One-sided Relationship

About The Author

Jennifer Dagi

Jennifer Dagi is happily married to her best friend and the love of her life.

As a relationship coach, she is passionate about helping couples build healthy and happy relationships.

She strongly believes communication and intimacy are the most important ingredients for building a successful relationship.

Join her on a fabulous journey to improve your love life one step at a time and don't forget to subscribe for weekly blog updates.

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