10 Signs He’s Cheating On You With His Ex

signs he's cheating on you with his ex

Relationships can be complicated, and sometimes the signs of trouble are not easy to spot.

One common source of tension between couples is when a partner is still in contact with an ex, especially if the ex was a significant part of their life.

While it’s possible to maintain a healthy friendship with an ex, it’s also possible for old feelings to resurface and lead to infidelity.

If you’re worried that your boyfriend or husband might be cheating with his ex, there are some red flags to watch out for.

By paying attention to his behavior, communication style, and social media activity, you can get a better sense of whether he’s being faithful or not.

If your man is suddenly acting cold and spends more time away from you, he’s likely rekindling an old flame behind your back.

Read on to discover some obvious signs he’s cheating on you with his ex, so you can stop being in the dark and decide if your relationship is worth saving.

signs he's cheating on you with his ex


If you’ve noticed some suspicious signs that suggest your partner might be cheating on you with his ex, it’s important to trust your instincts and gather more evidence before confronting him.

Here are some warning signs you’ll see if your man is sleeping with his ex:

1. He’s spending more time away from you 

One of the most common signs a man is having an affair is that he’s busy all of a sudden and won’t hang out with you often.

If your guy is spending more and more time away from you lately, it could be a sign he’s having fun with another woman.

Is he suddenly working late more often or going out for “boys’ nights” several times a week? He may be using this time to meet up with his ex behind your back.

Pay attention if your man is being shady about where he’s going or who he’s talking to.

If he avoids answering your questions directly or gets defensive, something fishy could be going on.

Notice if his routine or habits have changed. If he used to call you on his way home from work but now he’s not calling as much, that’s a red flag.

Or if he used to spend his weekends with you but now he’s busy every Saturday, that’s suspicious.

Check for unexplained charges on bank or credit card statements.

If you’re seeing charges for gifts, meals, or hotels that you have no knowledge of, he may be lavishing his ex with presents or taking her on secret getaways.

Try not to jump to conclusions just yet – have an open and honest conversation with your guy about your relationship and set clear expectations.

With improved communication and transparency, you’ll know the truth in no time and can decide if the relationship is worth saving or if it’s time to move on to someone new.

2. His ex keeps coming up in conversations 

When a man makes his former lover a frequent topic of discussion in his new relationship, it means he’s still seeing her and hasn’t moved on yet.

Does your partner complain about irrelevant things his ex does or gets jealous when she’s looks happy?

Does he bring up his ex during conversations or drop little comments about her and stories from when they were together? If so, she’s clearly still on his mind.

One of the biggest red flags that your partner may be cheating on you with his ex is if he’s constantly communicating with her and talking about her with you.

If your partner is always on his phone and seems to be in constant communication with his ex, it may be a sign that something is going on.

Any contact with an ex is suspicious, especially if he hides it from you or deletes their messages.

Plus, if he’s always talking about her with you, it means there’s something more going on between the both of them.

Let him know his behavior is unacceptable and that he needs to cut contact with her once and for all if he wants to keep you around!

You deserve a man who’s focused on you and you alone. Don’t settle for less!

signs he's cheating on you with his ex

3. He’s hiding or protecting his phone 

Another red flag to look out for is if your partner is being secretive about his behavior.

This could mean that he’s hiding his phone and laptop from you or he’s being vague about his plans.

Has your guy started acting weird with his phone lately? If he’s hiding it from you, constantly checking it, or never leaving it unattended, that could be a sign he’s communicating with his ex.

Don’t ignore the warning signs that he may be cheating. His phone is his link to his ex, so of course he’s going to guard it with his life if he’s messaging her behind your back.

He knows that one peek at his texts or call log could reveal everything. Don’t let him make you feel like a “crazy, jealous girlfriend” for wondering why he’s being so shady.

You have every right to feel insecure when he’s acting this way. The next time you notice him clutching his phone like it’s a winning lottery ticket, call him out on it.

Let him know his behavior is unacceptable and hurtful. If he gets angry or defensive instead of reassuring you, that’s a major red flag.

A man who has nothing to hide will be transparent in his activities and won’t keep secrets from you.

So, if things feel off in your relationship and your man’s phone is at the center of it, trust your gut and don’t ignore the signs.

4. He pays a lot of attention to his appearance 

If your man suddenly seems obsessed with his appearance, it could be a sign his ex is back in the picture.

Is he spending way more time doing his hair and picking out outfits before going out?

Does he seem overly concerned with how he looks in photos with you that he posts online? If so, this vain behavior could indicate he’s trying to impress someone else – like his ex.

When a guy is focused on you, he relaxes into the relationship and doesn’t feel the need to always be “on” or perfectly groomed.

The fact that he’s putting in extra effort to look his best lately is a red flag that he may be seeing his ex on the side and wants to appear as attractive as possible for her.

He could even be changing his style to match what he knows she finds appealing.

Of course, some guys just like to look good for their own self-confidence, but if this behavior seems out of character for your man, it’s worth investigating further.

A quick check of his social media accounts or call log may reveal if he’s been in recent contact with his ex.

And if he gets defensive when you ask him about his newfound obsession or who exactly he’s trying to impress, that’s a sure sign you need to get to the bottom of what’s really going on.

The truth may hurt, but it’s better than being left in the dark while he rekindles an old flame right under your nose!

5. He’s less affectionate toward you 

If your man used to shower you with kisses, hold you close, gaze into your eyes, and now he barely pecks you on the cheek, that’s a major red flag.

Men are physical creatures, so if he’s not being affectionate with you, he’s likely directing that affection elsewhere – possibly toward his ex.

Pay attention if he pulls away when you try to hug him, stops initiating lovemaking, or doesn’t even want to hold hands anymore.

Don’t make excuses for his behavior or blame yourself. His lack of affection and intimacy is a sign that he may have rekindled an emotional and physical connection with his former girlfriend.

Confront him about the changes you’ve noticed in his behavior and see how he reacts. If he gets overly defensive, makes up silly excuses, or tries to turn the tables on you, trust your instincts.

You deserve a loving relationship where you feel cherished and cared for. Don’t settle for less than you’re worth.

signs he's cheating on you with his ex

6. Unexplained purchases or receipts show up 

Have mysterious receipts suddenly started appearing that you just can’t explain?

Receipts for gifts you never received, dinners you didn’t share, or hotel rooms you didn’t stay in are major red flags that your partner may be cheating with his ex.

When your significant other starts lavishing his ex with gifts and romantic gestures behind your back, the receipts are bound to surface eventually.

Maybe you found a receipt for an expensive piece of jewelry you never got, or receipts for a romantic dinner at your favorite restaurant on a night you know you were home alone.

These unexplained receipts are a sign that your partner’s affections and finances are being spent on someone else – most likely his ex.

Confront your significant other about these receipts right away. His reaction and explanation will reveal a lot about what’s really going on.

If he gets defensive or blames you for “snooping,” that’s a sure sign something shady is up and he’s trying to cover it up. Don’t ignore this evidence that’s staring you in the face.

Unexplained expenses are a clear signal that your partner may be cheating on you with his ex and you deserve a truthful explanation.

7. He’s not too enthusiastic about his ex getting a new boyfriend 

Another obvious sign your partner is sleeping with his former girlfriend is that he gets upset if he sees her with someone else or perceives she’s moving on.

If your man seems overly concerned with his ex’s dating life, that’s a huge red flag. He should not care this much if he’s really over her!

Here are other signs to watch out for:

He’s always asking if you’ve heard anything about who she’s seeing.

He makes snide comments about her new boyfriend.

He stalks her social media accounts to see if she’s posted any new relationship updates.

He tries to sabotage her dates or new relationships. This is controlling behavior and a huge warning sign.

If your guy is truly committed to you, he wouldn’t give two hoots about his ex’s love life. A new relationship of his own should be his main focus.

If he’s still clinging to the past, it may be time for you to move on to someone who will give you their full attention and affection. You deserve so much better than being a man’s second choice!

8. He invites her to couple outings and family gatherings 

Men usually introduce their girlfriends to the most important people in their lives to show they are special and that the relationship is getting serious.

If your guy is inviting his ex to join you for date nights, family dinners, or couple vacations, that’s a big red flag.

He’s still in love with his former flame and wants her to be a part of his life. Or he’s not over her yet and wants to show what a great catch he is by parading a new girlfriend in front of her.

You deserve so much better than to be played or be used as a prop to make an ex jealous.

A man who genuinely cares about you will keep his past relationships in the past and focus on building a future with you.

He won’t subject you to awkward encounters or force you to make small talk with an ex he’s clearly not over. Don’t settle for someone who’s still living in the past or chasing after an ex.

The right guy for you won’t have eyes for anyone else and will be overjoyed to have you by his side at every event, not using you to provoke jealousy in a former flame.

Know your worth and don’t ignore this glaring red flag. Have a heart-to-heart conversation with your guy and let him know his behavior is unacceptable.

If he doesn’t change his ways, move on and find a man who will treat you like the queen you are!

signs he's cheating on you with his ex

9. He avoids making love to you 

One of the most noticeable changes in behavior that could indicate your man is cheating on you with his ex is a sudden lack of interest in intimacy.

While this could be due to a variety of reasons, including stress or health issues, it could also be a sign that his needs are being met elsewhere.

If a man is cheating on his partner with his ex, he may feel guilty about sleeping with both women and therefore may not be interested in making love with his current partner.

Alternatively, he may be getting his intimate needs met with his ex and therefore not feel the need to make love with his significant other.

It’s important to note that a lack of interest in intimacy does not necessarily mean a man is cheating, but it is something to be aware of and to discuss with your partner.

If you notice that your man is suddenly uninterested in lovemaking, try to have an open and honest conversation with him about it.

There may be an underlying issue that needs to be addressed, and it’s important to communicate openly and honestly to maintain a healthy relationship.

10. His ex seems too friendly toward you 

Another sign your partner is cheating on you with his ex is that she behaves unusually nice and friendly toward you.

Maybe she calls you regularly, invites you to her social events, or buys beautiful gifts for your kids.

If your partner’s ex-girlfriend seems cheerful and caring toward you, that’s a sign she’s got your man wrapped around her little finger.

Typically, ex-girlfriends are often hostile, dramatic, or cold when they meet with their former lover’s new partner.

If your guy’s ex is suddenly treating you like her new BFF, something fishy is going on. No one gets that close that fast unless they’re working an angle.

Here are some signs she’s being fake-friendly:

She’s complimenting you like crazy. Excessive flattery is not genuine. She’s buttering you up to throw you off the scent.

She’s asking super personal questions to gather intel to use against you later. Don’t reveal anything you don’t want to get back to your guy.

She’s offering to do favors for you. No one is that helpful unless they want something. She’s trying to win your trust so you don’t suspect she’s still seeing your man.

She’s trash-talking your guy to you. This is a trick to make you think she’s on your side. Don’t fall for it! She’s still in love with him and wants you out of the picture.

This shady behavior means the ex still has feelings for your guy and wants to cause trouble.

Put your guard up, call her out on her fakeness, and have a serious talk with your man about setting clear boundaries.

It’s also important to stay alert for other signs he’s cheating and be ready to move on if you find solid proof that the past isn’t in the past after all.


When your partner is sleeping with someone else, you’ll definitely know it because you’ll sense some changes in his behavior and your gut will tell you something is wrong.

Keep your eyes open for the telltale signs mentioned in this article, and don’t ignore your intuition if something feels off in your relationship.

If you suspect that your partner may be sleeping with his ex, have an honest conversation with him about your concerns and set clear boundaries.

You deserve to be in a healthy relationship where you feel respected, loved, and cared for.

If your man lies about his infidelity even when you’ve shown him proof, don’t hesitate to make a clean break and move on to someone who will treat you well and commit to you fully.


Recommended Reading:

10 Obvious Signs He Still Has Feelings For His Ex

How To Tell If He Has Another Girlfriend

9 Signs Your Partner Wants To Break Up With You

About The Author

Jennifer Dagi
 | Blog

Jennifer Dagi is happily married to her best friend and the love of her life.

As a relationship coach, she is passionate about helping couples build healthy and happy relationships.

She strongly believes communication and intimacy are the most important ingredients for building a successful relationship.

Join her on a fabulous journey to improve your love life one step at a time and don't forget to subscribe for weekly blog updates.

error: Content is protected!