There are a lot of fake relationships on social media today.
If you’re not mindful, you may find yourself getting jealous and comparing your relationship to other couples displaying their romantic love online.
Sadly, most couples who look happy on social media are often unhappy in real life. The truth is, the more you post on social media, the more insecure you are.
According to Johnneil Bertrand, “The best sign of a healthy relationship is no sign of it on Facebook.”
You can tell how emotionally stable someone is just by looking at their social media habits over a duration of time.
But, the ultimate question is, “Can social media affect your relationship?” Yes, it certainly can alter your love life in a bad way!
Recent research shows that compulsive social media use adversely affects romantic relationships due to jealousy, envy, suspicion, surveillance, and infidelity.
According to dating expert, Louanne Ward, “Social media can become a form of behavioral addiction that negatively affects other areas of life including relationships.”
If you notice common social media red flags like too much PDA, secret online accounts, and frequent memes about bad relationships, you may have a toxic partner.
So what does a healthy relationship look like and how can you tell if your relationship is being impaired by social media?
It’s really simple — watch out for the red flags that show up in your love life when you’re dating.
Here’s the thing though, identifying relationship red flags on social media can be tricky especially as most people are online these days.
However, there are often subtle signs that show up on social media when your relationship is in trouble.
Most people often mistake them for yellow flags, but if you look closely, you’ll be able to spot the warning signs before it’s too late.
TOP 10 SOCIAL MEDIA RED FLAGS IN A RELATIONSHIP
One of the first signs of relationship problems on social media is when your partner is constantly validating your love life on Facebook by sharing couple photos regularly.
In this article, we explore some of the most evident social media red flags in a relationship to help you know if your love life is headed in the right direction.
Whether you just started dating someone new or you’ve been together for a long time, take a look at these relationship red flags on social media.
#1 Spending too much time on social media when you’re together
A healthy relationship thrives when there is open communication, trust, and quality time.
When you’re with someone who is emotionally stable, they’ll prioritize your time together by paying attention to you and listening to your every word.
A big red flag to watch out for is when your significant other is constantly ignoring you and spending more of their time on social media.
Unless it’s linked to their career, this behavior is rude and disrespectful.
Your partner is supposed to be actively focused on maintaining an emotional connection with you to ensure the growth of your relationship.
If the virtual world is more important to them than your love life, this is a major cause for concern.
#2 Documenting your entire relationship online
One of the biggest signs of relationship insecurity on social media is when someone posts every little detail about their relationship online.
It’s okay to share beautiful photos from your vacation, wedding, or any other significant event with your social circle.
However, posting about your spa date night or backyard scavenger hunt is not necessary.
It’s so sickening to see perfect couple pictures all over social media and too much PDA looks pretentious most of the time.
Your relationship is meant to be between you and your partner and the whole world doesn’t need to have a front-row seat in your reality show.
Documenting your entire romantic relationship online is a serious red flag you shouldn’t ignore.
If your partner always shares where you go on dates or what you eat for dinner every night when you’re not influencers, this is not a good sign.
They may be suffering from low self-esteem and need constant approval outside your relationship.
#3 Posting relationship problems on social media
Privacy is a vital part of building intimate relationships and it creates mutual trust between couples over a long time.
The Love Doctor Dr. Terri Orbuch says, “Having enough space or privacy in a relationship is more important for a couple’s happiness than having a good intimate life.”
A major red flag in a relationship is when couples spread their dirty linen online.
According to relationship experts, posting your relationship problems on social media is a sign of insecurity.
As a healthy couple, when you’re going through challenges, the first thing you can do is try to solve your issues on your own.
If this doesn’t work, seeking the help of a relationship coach or marriage counselor is a good idea.
There is no need to share your relationship problems with others on social media, especially if you’re trying to make things work.
Moreover, since everyone has differing opinions, sharing your issues online in a bid to get helpful advice can leave you more confused than ever before.
If your partner constantly posts memes about relationship frustrations or details about the issues you’re struggling with on social media, this is a huge red flag.
Consider going for couples counseling to fix what’s not working in your love life.
#4 Comparing you or your relationship to others online
There are lots of couples who pretend to be in perfect relationships on social media.
They often flaunt their glamorous lifestyle online for everyone to see when in fact, they’re on the brink of a breakup.
The sad part is, that you may secretly envy them because you think they have a fairytale love life that you can only dream of. You’re not alone though!
Social media relationship jealousy is real and it becomes dangerous when you compare yourself to other people you see online.
Has your partner ever mentioned that you need to be more like someone they admire on the internet?
If they’re comparing you to insecure couples on social media, chances are that you’re in a toxic relationship.
#5 Bragging about your relationship on social media
One of the most common red flags in a relationship is when someone brags about their partner or love life on their social media accounts.
This is a desperate attempt to show people that their relationship is perfect when it’s not all rosy in real life.
Does your significant other constantly post photos of you with gaudy headlines or exaggerated compliments that make you uncomfortable?
They’re trying to portray a perfect love story to the world which could backfire later.
This is a warning sign that your love life might be in trouble behind the scenes or that you’re in an unhealthy relationship with someone who is not emotionally mature.
If your partner is boasting about you or your relationship on social media, they could be trying to make an ex-lover jealous which means they’ve not moved on and could still be harboring feelings for them.
#6 Changing their relationship status to “Single” or “It’s Complicated”
When someone gets into a new relationship, the first thing they usually do is announce it on several social media platforms because they want the world to know they’ve found love.
Likewise, if they’re experiencing challenges or going through a hard time, they let people know about it on social media too.
So, it’s pretty normal to update your online status from time to time.
However, when someone who seemed to be happy in a relationship suddenly changes their status overnight, it’s alarming, to say the least.
If you’re in a committed relationship and notice that your significant other has changed their relationship status on Facebook to “Single” or “It’s Complicated”, this is an obvious red flag.
#7 Having secret social media accounts you don’t have access to
Keeping secrets in a romantic relationship is never a good thing and it often comes back to haunt you when you least expect it.
When one partner is hiding something from the other person, it’s obvious they are engaging in suspicious activities and don’t want to be caught.
Have you discovered that your other half is operating multiple social media accounts at the same time and hiding this information from you?
They’re definitely up to something fishy and you deserve to know the truth.
“If your partner is operating a secret account, they could be using it to post a lot of selfies that are “flirty” in nature to gain attention from other people,” says Jeanne Sullivan Billeci, Dating Coach and Communications Expert at My Soul Mate Coach.
Before you jump to conclusions though, give them the benefit of doubt and ask them about their suspicious online activity. It may turn out to be a harmless hobby of theirs after all!
#8 Constantly engaging with a particular person online
Another clear red flag to watch out for on social media is when your significant other interacts with a particular person consistently.
Most times, cheating starts as harmless conversations online that spiral into a full-blown physical affair with a new lover.
If you notice your partner dropping flirty comments on someone’s profile, chatting with them amorously, and liking their posts all the time, they could be micro-cheating.
Whether your partner is physically involved with this person or not, engaging with them online in an intimate way when they’re in a serious relationship shows a lack of respect for you.
#9 Hiding your relationship from friends and family
Unless you’re just having a whirlwind romance with someone, your significant other is supposed to introduce you to the most important people in their life.
Even if they don’t do it formally, their loved ones can know they have a new partner if they add you as a friend on Facebook, post recent photos of you on their social media profiles, and like or comment on your posts.
A definite red flag to watch out for is when your partner is hiding your relationship from his friends and family members.
Do they treat you like a total stranger on social media by intentionally avoiding associating with you? That’s not a good sign!
If they’re stashing you, it’s probably because they don’t want to be forced to invite you to family events and it would be easier to dump you when they get tired of the relationship.
#9 Stalking their exes online long after breaking up
Almost everyone is guilty of checking up on their ex to see what they’re up to after a relationship ends.
This is pretty normal especially when you’re not over them yet and you secretly want them back.
A huge red flag to look out for on social media is when your romantic partner is clinging to past relationships and stalking their ex after a long time.
It’s okay if they mention their ex-lover once in a while when the opportunity arises.
However, if they’re still following their former lover on social media, looking at their profiles, or liking their posts, this is a sign of toxic behavior and you need to take the necessary steps to deal with it.
Whether they’re romantically involved or not, it’s a red flag when your partner consistently engages with their ex on social media or in real life—unless they have a child together.
There are so many social media habits that can hurt a relationship and if you’re not aware of them, they could cause irreparable damage to your love life and even mental health.
While using the internet on a consistent basis is not a bad thing, prioritizing your online life over your real life is dangerous.
And when social media becomes addictive, it impacts other aspects of your life negatively.
The first step to preventing the online world from impairing your relationship is to watch out for the social media red flags mentioned in this article.
If you see any deal breakers, talk to your partner about them and find a way to strike a healthy balance in your love life.
Of course, it’s okay to end the relationship if your partner refuses to change and you feel sidelined by their actions.
About The Author
Jennifer Dagi is happily married to her best friend and the love of her life.
As a relationship coach, she is passionate about helping couples build healthy and happy relationships.
She strongly believes communication and intimacy are the most important ingredients for building a successful relationship.
Join her on a fabulous journey to improve your love life one step at a time and don't forget to subscribe for weekly blog updates.