14 Things Men Find Unattractive In Women

things men find unattractive in women

Do you know there are certain things women do that men find unattractive in a relationship?

You may think he doesn’t notice them but guys see everything you do even if they don’t say it.

Since men don’t like to complain about what’s bothering them, you may not know that your man is turned off by your behavior.

To help you improve your love life and keep your man happy, take a look at some of the things you need to avoid doing in your relationship.


If you’ve been doing these toxic things in your relationship, consider stopping them because men don’t like it when women behave this way.

#1 Lack of respect

One of the most important things a man wants in a romantic relationship is respect from his woman.

A man may not mind if you don’t know how to cook or clean as long as you treat him nicely and give him the respect he deserves.

However, if you speak to him harshly, criticize him all the time, and humiliate him in public, you’ll lose his love and devotion.

No matter how angry you are, try to regulate your emotions and practice good communication skills in your relationship.

Don’t raise your voice at him or abuse him verbally, especially in front of other people and avoid mocking him when he does the wrong things.

things men find unattractive in women

#2 Not giving him enough attention

A lot of women are addicted to their smartphones and this makes them snub their romantic partners on a consistent basis.

Men find it unattractive when you pay more attention to your phone or the TV while you’re around them.

For example, if your man is talking to you and you’re scrolling through Facebook or Instagram instead of listening attentively, it can make him angry.

It’s important to give your romantic partner adequate attention and spend quality time with him regularly.

Don’t prioritize your phone over him, especially when you’re having meaningful conversations.

If you also prefer to hang out with your close friends most of the time, try to make space for your significant other too.

When you put your man on the back burner, it can make him feel neglected and unwanted, which isn’t good for the growth of your relationship.

#3 Excessive jealousy

A little bit of jealousy is good in a relationship but when you become overly possessive of your man, it can turn him off.

If you are a woman who is constantly jealous and suspicious of your man, you’ll end up losing his trust.

Men love secure, confident, and assertive women who behave maturely in a relationship.

Of course, this doesn’t mean you should turn a blind eye to everything he does but you need to know where to draw the line in your relationship.

For example, if your man tells you he’s working late at the office, trust his word and give him the benefit of the doubt.

Don’t assume he’s hanging out somewhere else with a side chick when you don’t have any proof.

#4 Conversations about exes

Another thing men find unattractive in a relationship is discussions about your exes.

I don’t know why women think it’s okay to drop their exes in conversations, but men find it appalling when you reminisce about your previous romantic partners.

Your man doesn’t care about your past relationships and he doesn’t want to know what your ex-lovers are up to now.

So whether your ex is sick, wants to get married, or just had a baby, keep it to yourself. Don’t bother your man with all that unnecessary information.

You’re supposed to cut off all contact with your exes and get rid of any emotional baggage you’re carrying before getting into a new relationship.

If you talk about your ex all the time, it means you’ve not moved on from your breakup and still think about them often.

To avoid sending the wrong message and pissing off your current partner, stop bringing up conversations about your former lover.

It’s totally inappropriate to talk about a person you used to date with someone you’re currently in a relationship with.

#5 Sharing private details with other people

Many women engage in this bad habit and think it’s normal but it’s a big turn-off for most men.

If you always gossip about your man to your friends or family, consider adjusting your behavior.

When you tell your loved ones sensitive things about your man, you’re teaching them how to disrespect him and look down on him.

And men don’t like it when you expose their secrets or talk about them behind their backs, especially when you’re revealing sensitive information to others.

Your relationship is meant to be a private affair between the two of you and involving a third party isn’t healthy.

Stop telling your friends how good your man is in bed or how frightened he gets when he sees a mouse.

When you ridicule a man in front of other people, you diminish his self-worth and most men don’t like being mocked or laughed at in public.

If you respect your man at all, you’ll maintain his dignity even in his absence.

things men find unattractive in women

#6 Persistent nagging

When you’re in a serious relationship with a man, it’s good to advise him when he makes mistakes and to express your true feelings at any given time.

However, what men find unattractive is when you consistently nag about a particular thing for several days.

You don’t need to say the same thing over and over again for him to understand you.

When you’ve shared your opinion with a man, give him time to think about it and figure out how to implement some changes in his life.

If you’re being impatient and choose to yell at him for not doing what you want, it’s a sign of disrespect and dominance.

And men don’t like it when you try to control them in any way. So learn to be patient, understanding, and supportive in your relationship.

#7 Having to beg to hang out with friends

The biggest reason why men have a commitment phobia is that they think they’ll lose their freedom when they get into a serious relationship.

So many women have this annoying habit of restricting a man’s movement and controlling his social life out of fear of abandonment.

They wrongly assume that if they give their man space and freedom, he’ll cheat on them with someone better.

The truth is that whether you monitor him or not, a promiscuous man who wants to cheat will find a way around it and there’s nothing you can do to change his personality.

And if a man has promised to be loyal, you don’t need to tie a rope around his waist to keep him by your side.

He’ll choose to remain faithful to you because he values your relationship and the bond you have together.

However, when a man has to beg or negotiate with you just to hang out with his friends, he’ll feel trapped in the relationship and will start looking for a way out.

So don’t hold him down out of fear or anxiety. Learn to trust your man and give him space to freely interact with his inner circle.

It’s unrealistic to expect him to spend all of his time with you at home. He’ll definitely get bored if all he does is stay with you every day of the week.

#8 Being too needy or dependent on him

Do you know that men find neediness unattractive in a relationship?

Most women think a man is supposed to cater to all their needs and neglect his own welfare in the name of love.

They make unrealistic demands and start fights when they don’t get what they want every time.

Being in a relationship is not just about what you can get but also what you have to offer.

Healthy couples know that they have to give and take from each other equally to have a successful relationship.

It’s unfair to expect a man to do everything for you and make you happy in a relationship.

Happiness comes from within and it is your job to fill your life with meaningful things that bring you joy.

If you’re too needy or dependent on a man for everything, he can get tired of you really fast.

Learn to be independent in a romantic relationship, so you don’t have to wait on a man to fulfill your needs.

Start a side hustle for extra cash, engage in your favorite hobbies often, and practice regular self-care to maintain a good level of happiness.

11 Practical Ways To Be Independent In A Relationship

#9 Focusing too much on your insecurities

Another bad habit women have that men find unattractive is paying a lot of attention to their perceived flaws and shortcomings.

Men don’t like it when you draw too much attention to your insecurities because it puts them in a tight spot.

What do you really expect him to respond when you say, “Gosh, look at my big thighs?”

If he agrees with you, you’ll become sad and if he doesn’t agree, you’ll say he’s lying.

To avoid turning off your man, don’t even mention your insecurities unless you’re planning to do something to improve them and you need his opinion.

Nobody is perfect and you should understand that if a man is with you, it’s because he loves you and accepts you just the way you are.

Your man knows that you’re not a Barbie doll who has an instagrammable body with an hourglass figure.

If you don’t say it, he may never notice your shortcomings so stop being insecure about your body size, stretch marks, or big thighs.

All your man wants from you is respect, attention, and good lovemaking. Learn to give him more of the things he likes and avoid the bad habits that turn him off.

things men find unattractive in women

#10 Constant drama in the relationship

Are you a drama queen who likes to cause chaos in a relationship when things look peaceful?

You need to adjust your behavior before your man leaves you.

You may think you’re being smart and confident by creating drama all the time but it’s not attractive to a man.

It’s okay to be angry or upset when your man offends you, but you don’t need to throw a tantrum every time something doesn’t go your way.

If you’re always making a big deal out of little things and starting fights for silly reasons, your man will gradually disconnect from you and won’t even tell you.

When you’re in a committed relationship, learn to control your emotions, give your man a break, and let him enjoy his peace of mind.

A healthy relationship isn’t meant to be violent and full of problems; instead, it should be a constant source of love, peace, and joy.

#11 Bringing up past issues when you fight

Men dislike it when you talk about old incidents that have been resolved or forgotten in a new fight.

They prefer to discuss the problem at hand and find a good solution for it instead of running around in circles.

So the next time you have an argument with your man, don’t bring up past issues that have already been settled.

There’s no point in playing the blame game or revisiting the past when it adds no value to the current problem you’re dealing with in your relationship.

Don’t keep scores or hold on to irrelevant things simply because you want to have something to talk about in the future.

Learn to forgive and let go of all grudges after every fight. That’s the best way to maintain a happy relationship with your man.

#12 Comparing him to other people in your life

Another thing men find unattractive in a relationship is comparisons whether negative or positive.

There’s nothing that makes a man angrier than when you compare him to another man, especially if he’s trying his best to be a good partner.

If you’ve been making snide comments and comparing your man to other people in your life, try to stop it because it can completely destroy your relationship.

When your man does something you don’t like, focus on what he did and advise him on how to do better next time instead of putting him down or comparing him to another person.

Everyone is unique in their own way so avoid comparisons as much as possible in your relationship.

Show your man how to improve in certain areas and compliment him when he does the right thing rather than abusing him verbally or expecting him to be like someone else.

If you keep comparing your man, you’ll shatter his self-image and he won’t see the need to try anymore.

#13 Reading meaning into everything

Since women are emotional beings, they like to overanalyze conversations and situations to uncover hidden meanings to things.

Do you often think there’s something more to what people tell you? You’re not the only one who does this!

However, this habit isn’t always helpful when you’re in a committed relationship with an honest and transparent man.

When you doubt what your man tells you or what he does even if his intentions are good, you risk losing him completely.

For instance, if your man tells you something and you think he means another thing, you’ll get yourself into trouble because you’re not on the same page with him.

Stop being a detective who is looking for clues to unravel a case and focus on building a strong relationship with your man by trusting him more.

If you’re always analyzing your man’s words and actions when he has proven his trustworthiness to you, it can make him very upset.

Instead of making wrong assumptions and accusing your man falsely, learn to ask the right questions when you don’t fully understand the situation at hand.

Things men hate in a relationship

#14 Not always being in the mood for intimacy

Another thing men find unattractive in women is having to constantly beg for physical intimacy.

It’s understandable if you don’t want to get intimate with your man because you’re sick or on your period, but neglecting his intimate needs for selfish reasons is not a good idea.

When you turn down a man’s advances in bed, it hurts his self-esteem and if you keep doing it for a long time, he’ll lose interest in you.

For example, if you always say you’re too tired or not in the mood for intimacy, he’ll feel tempted to get pleasure elsewhere.

Stop rejecting your man in bed all the time because intimacy is a big deal for most men.

If you’re a woman who withholds intimacy to punish your man, know that you’re gradually pushing him away with your behavior.

Having intercourse is one of the best ways men express their love and reconnect with you at the end of the day.

Learn to make room for intimacy and schedule romance on less busy days, so you can keep your man happy in a relationship.


There are so many things women do that men find unattractive, but they may not tell it to your face and could just be waiting for the right moment to leave.

If you’ve been doing any of these bad habits, consider changing your attitude because your romantic relationship could be at stake.


Recommended Reading:

15 Biggest Mistakes Women Make In Relationships

7 Things Men Find Attractive In A Woman

10 Annoying Things Women Do That Chase Men Away

About The Author

Jennifer Dagi
 | Blog

Jennifer Dagi is happily married to her best friend and the love of her life.

As a relationship coach, she is passionate about helping couples build healthy and happy relationships.

She strongly believes communication and intimacy are the most important ingredients for building a successful relationship.

Join her on a fabulous journey to improve your love life one step at a time and don't forget to subscribe for weekly blog updates.

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