Relationships can sometimes be complicated, especially when past love still lingers in the picture.
It’s not unusual for people to carry some emotional baggage after a breakup.
But when you’re dating a woman who is still in love with her former flame, it can be unsettling to feel like you’re competing with a ghost from her past.
If you’ve been wondering whether your partner has truly moved on from her ex, there are some behaviors and red flags to watch out for.
This blog post explores some common signs a woman still has feelings for her ex and what to do if you’re in this situation.
10 GLARING SIGNS SHE STILL HAS FEELINGS FOR HER EX
When a woman is still emotionally attached to her ex, it often shows in her words, actions, and body language, even if that’s not her intention.
She might talk about him a lot, stalk him on social media, and even struggle to commit to a new relationship.
If you suspect that your woman’s heart is with someone else, here are 10 glaring signs she still has feelings for her ex:
1. She brings him up often in conversations or arguments
One of the clearest signs a woman is not over her ex is if his name constantly comes up in everyday conversations.
It could be casual—like saying, “Oh, my ex used to love this restaurant,”—or more serious, such as, “My ex never used to do that.”
This habit shows he’s still on her mind, consciously or subconsciously.
While it’s natural to occasionally reference the past, frequent mentions of a former lover can signal unresolved feelings.
If she compares you to him during arguments, it’s especially concerning because it places you in competition with someone who isn’t even present.
2. She stays in regular contact with him
It’s common for exes to remain in touch, especially if they share responsibilities like children or mutual friends.
But if your partner regularly texts, calls, or meets up with her ex without a clear reason, it may go beyond friendship.
For example, if she updates him about her life more often than she does you, or if she turns to him for emotional support, that’s a red flag.
Emotional intimacy is a strong indicator of lingering affection, and if she hasn’t drawn boundaries, it could mean she’s not ready to fully invest in your relationship.
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3. She stalks him on social media
Social media keeps us updated about the world and provides an easy way for us to connect with people, no matter where we are.
However, many individuals use it to spy on others, especially their exes.
If you notice your partner checks her ex’s profiles frequently, likes his posts, or knows details about his day-to-day life, it’s a sign she’s still interested in him.
For instance, she might casually mention, “I saw he traveled to Miami last week,” even though they haven’t spoken directly.
This level of curiosity and digital monitoring suggests she hasn’t emotionally detached.
4. She gets emotional talking about him
The way a woman reacts when her ex is mentioned says a lot.
If she becomes visibly upset, nostalgic, or defensive, it reveals that her emotions are still tied to him.
For example, if a friend brings up her ex and she quickly changes the subject, blushes, or gets irritated, that discomfort may signal unresolved feelings.
Strong emotions, whether positive or negative, mean her previous relationship still holds a special place in her heart.
5. She keeps mementos from their relationship
A big sign a woman still has feelings for her ex is that she holds on to some sentimental items from the relationship.
Most people keep a few items from their past, but holding on to significant mementos like love letters, gifts, or photos can show she’s not ready to let go.
If these items are tucked away in a box, it might be harmless nostalgia.
But if they’re prominently displayed in her room, or she refuses to part with them despite your discomfort, it can mean she’s clinging to the emotional connection they represent.
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6. She still talks to his family and friends
Staying in touch with an ex’s social circle isn’t always suspicious, especially if they became genuine friends.
However, if she prioritizes those relationships and consistently asks about her ex, it may signal a deeper attachment.
For example, if she calls his mom regularly or attends family gatherings where he’ll be present, that suggests she’s holding on to more than just casual friendships.
Maintaining contact with his loved ones could be her way of keeping one foot in his world.
7. She’s curious about his love life
Another telltale sign a woman hasn’t moved on from her ex is if she asks about his dating status or shows interest in his relationships.
Curiosity alone isn’t unusual, but when it comes with jealousy, sadness, or constant questioning, it points to unresolved feelings.
For example, if she hears he’s seeing someone new and becomes withdrawn or starts criticizing the other woman, it’s a clear sign she still views him as someone important in her life.
8. She uses him as a benchmark and compares you to him
When your partner measures your relationship against her past one, it’s a strong indicator that she hasn’t fully moved on.
These comparisons might be subtle such as, “My ex always remembered our anniversary” or more direct, like comparing your appearance, your lifestyle, or even your performance in the bedroom.
This behavior can be damaging because it prevents her from appreciating you for who you are.
It also keeps her past relationship alive in her present, which isn’t healthy for either of you.
9. She dreams or fantasizes about him
It’s not unusual for people to dream about their exes occasionally.
But if your partner frequently brings up dreams involving him or admits to thinking about “what could have been,” it’s a red flag.
When a woman tells you she dreamed about marrying her ex or talks wistfully about their romantic moments, it suggests she’s holding onto fantasies from her past relationship.
10. She hesitates to commit fully to you
One of the most obvious signs a woman has feelings for her ex is her inability to commit wholeheartedly to your relationship.
This hesitation may show up as avoiding labels, being unclear about future plans, or keeping you at arm’s length emotionally.
For instance, she might avoid conversations about moving in together, meeting your family, or making long-term plans.
Often, this reluctance stems from the fact that part of her heart is still with her ex, and she’s afraid of letting go completely.
WHAT TO DO IF YOUR PARTNER STILL HAS FEELINGS FOR HER EX
Discovering that your partner may still have feelings for her ex can be overwhelming and even painful.
But before jumping to conclusions or making a quick decision to walk away, it’s important to approach the situation with clarity, self-respect, and open communication.
Here are practical steps you can take if you find yourself in this position:
• Don’t react in the heat of the moment
Your first instinct may be to get angry, accuse her, or shut down completely.
While those feelings are natural, reacting impulsively can make things worse.
Instead, take a step back and give yourself a little time to process what you’ve discovered.
This allows you to approach the conversation with a clear mind rather than being clouded by emotions.
• Have an honest conversation
Once you’ve gathered your thoughts, bring up your concerns in a calm and respectful way.
Use “I” statements instead of accusations. For example, say: “I feel uneasy when you bring up your ex often, and I want to understand what that means for our relationship.”
This shifts the focus to your feelings rather than attacking her, which makes it easier for her to be open and honest in return.
• Listen without interrupting
It may be hard to hear her perspective, but listening carefully can help you understand where she’s coming from.
Sometimes lingering feelings for an ex are more about nostalgia or unfinished healing than a genuine desire to go back.
Giving her space to explain may reveal whether this is an issue you can work through together.
• Set boundaries that protect you
If your partner admits she’s struggling to move on from her ex, it’s important to establish boundaries that protect your emotional well-being.
This could mean reducing unnecessary contact with her ex, avoiding constant comparisons, or letting go of mementos that cause strain in your relationship.
Boundaries aren’t about control—they’re about ensuring the relationship feels safe and respectful for both partners.
• Evaluate the relationship honestly
After the conversation, reflect on what you’ve learned.
Ask yourself: Is she willing to let go of the past and fully commit to me?.Or am I constantly going to feel like I’m competing with her ex?
Be honest with yourself about what you need in a relationship.
• Consider counseling if needed
Sometimes, unresolved feelings for an ex are tied to deeper issues that can benefit from professional guidance.
Couples counseling or individual therapy can provide tools for both of you to move forward in a healthier way.
• Know when to walk away
If your significant other isn’t willing to change her behavior or continues to put her ex above your relationship, it may be time to move on.
While it’s painful, choosing yourself in this situation is an act of self-respect.
You deserve to be with someone who is fully invested in you, not someone stuck in the past.
Conclusion
Realizing your partner may still have feelings for her ex can be heart-wrenching, but it’s important to remember that the signs don’t automatically mean she doesn’t care for you.
People heal at different paces, and sometimes these behaviors are unintentional.
If you notice several of these signs, the healthiest step is open and honest communication.
Share how her actions make you feel without accusations, and listen to her perspective with an open mind.
From there, you can decide whether the relationship can grow stronger with honesty or whether it’s time to step away for your own sanity.
Finally, remember that you deserve to be with someone who is fully present, emotionally available, and excited about building a future with you.
Don’t settle for being second best to someone’s past. Choose love that chooses you back.
Recommended reading:
How To Stop Loving Someone Who Doesn’t Love You