12 Reasons Why Men Come Back After Breakup

why men come back

Have you ever wondered why men come back years later after a breakup?

If you’ve ever asked, “What makes a man come back after a breakup?” You’re not alone!

There are many reasons why exes resurface after the end of a relationship.

One of the obvious reasons why men come back after breakup is because they didn’t find another woman as good as you to build a romantic relationship with.

Most times, when people break up, they feel they’ll find someone better than their current partner, but soon discover that what they had was irreplaceable and come back begging for another chance.

My ex came back several years after our breakup and wanted to reconnect with me, but I turned him down since I don’t date my exes, especially the ones who dumped me.

If an ex recently came back into your life and you were confused about his intentions, here are some common reasons why men come back after breakup.


Is your ex trying to get back with you after your relationship ended? Here’s why he’s trying to come back:

1. He regrets losing you

One of the most common reasons why men come back months later after breakup is that they feel regretful about their previous relationship with you.

When an ex looks back at all the good times you had and the beautiful memories you created together, he might feel sorry for letting you go.

If a man realizes he had a great relationship with you and lost it due to his reckless behavior, he’ll deeply regret his actions and try to come back into your life.

why men come back after breakup

2. He didn’t find another woman as good as you

Another obvious reason why a man will come back to you after a failed relationship is because he couldn’t find someone better than you.

He probably dated other women when you broke up but soon realized that none of them had the unique personality traits he was looking for.

As a result, he’ll try to reconcile with you because he knows you have everything he needs in a life partner.

If an ex is seeking to get back into your life, chances are he didn’t find a better option after the breakup.

3. He’s still in love with you

I once broke up with my partner because of something trivial and later realized he was the love of my life.

Sometimes people don’t know they’ve found their soulmate and will break up with them over little issues, only to discover later that they’ve lost their true love.

Another real reason why a guy comes back after a breakup is that he still has feelings for you and can’t get over you.

4. He wants to stay friends

Typically, when men come back immediately after breaking up with you, it’s because they’re seeking friendship.

They know a romantic relationship cannot work for both of you, and losing you forever sounds unbearable, so they propose to stay friends instead of parting ways.

If an ex comes back a few weeks after break up, there’s a high chance he’s looking for a platonic relationship with you because he recognizes your value now.

why men come back months later

5. He feels lost without you

Another reason why men come back after breakup is that they feel they’ve lost an important woman in their lives.

For example, if your ex was an author or businessman who relied on your wisdom or expertise to move his trade forward, he may find it difficult to progress without you.

As a result of the void in his life, he’ll come back to reunite with you because he needs you to succeed in his craft.

If you were a vital part of a man’s life, he may feel lost without you and will come back after the breakup.

6. He doesn’t want anyone else to have you

Another reason why an ex can come back into your life is that he doesn’t want you to move on and be happy with your life.

He expects you to stay single and lonely after the breakup, so when he sees you with someone else, he’ll reintroduce himself into your life to cause chaos.

This is typical if you dated a malignant narcissist who saw you as his personal property.

You may mistakenly think he’s back because he loves you and can’t move on, but the truth is, he has noticed that you’re happy without him and feels jealous about your new relationship.

If an ex comes back to profess his love for you when he knows you have a new boyfriend, he’s definitely playing with your emotions and trying to destroy your current relationship.

Don’t be fooled by his charming personality or remorseful behavior; he doesn’t have good plans for you.

7. He wants to get revenge on you

Some people secretly want to get revenge on their exes, especially the ones who hurt them badly, and when they can’t achieve this from afar, they’ll come closer.

There’s a popular saying that if you want to defeat your enemy, become his friend.

Another reason why an ex may come back into your life is that he wants to know all your secrets and use them to destroy you.

If an ex tries to reconcile with you after you dumped him, he could be pretending to love you to earn your trust and love, so you don’t suspect his motives.

why men come back after breakup

8. He feels bad about the way things ended

A common reason why men come back after ghosting you is that they feel remorseful about how things ended between you.

Maybe your ex promised to stay for the long haul or made you believe he was going to marry you, then disappeared suddenly, leaving you confused and brokenhearted.

If a man leaves without an explanation, he may feel guilty for treating you without respect and will come back to make amends.

9. He realizes that you’re his soulmate

Most people believe that we only have one soulmate in our lifetime and that if you don’t find your other half, you may never experience real intimacy with anyone on Earth.

Have you ever dated someone who swept you off your feet and made you feel like you’ve always known each other even before you met?

And when you break up with this person, you have an inner knowing that you can never find such deep love again? That’s what we call a soulmate connection!

If a man feels you’re his soulmate and that he has lost his one shot at finding true love, he’ll come back into your life after a break up.

10. He’s ready to commit to a long-term relationship with you

Many men have a commitment phobia when it comes to dating and relationships.

While they enjoy being with a woman, they fear losing their freedom and independence.

As a result of a man’s non-committal behavior, a good relationship can end, leaving both partners with a broken heart.

After a breakup, an ex may realize that living without you is painful and will decide to commit to a long-term relationship with you if it means having you in his life forever.

If you’re wondering why your ex-boyfriend has come back into your life after so many years, chances are he’s finally ready to commit to you and build a long-lasting relationship.

why men come back years later

11. He needs closure to move on

When a romantic relationship ends abruptly without an explanation, most people struggle to move on with their lives because of unfinished business.

For instance, when someone sends a short breakup message to a romantic partner and cuts off all communication with them, they’ll feel confused about why things ended suddenly.

In a bid to get to the bottom of the situation and get answers, they’ll look for ways to reach out to the person who dumped them.

A major reason why men come back after you ignore them is that they’re looking for that feeling of completeness to enable them to move on.

If you ended things with your former partner without discussing your problems extensively, he might come back into your life to get closure.

12. He wants to sleep with you for the last time

Many people have the fear of missing out, which makes them want to get something even if they don’t really need it.

When a guy is about to get married or leave for another country and knows he might never see you again, he’ll come back into your life to sleep with you for the last time.

He knows you’re not good together but can’t afford to miss getting intimate with you one last time because he’ll keep thinking about you if he doesn’t.

If you had a passionate relationship with your ex, he might reconnect with you to get some rounds of hot lovemaking before disappearing forever.

why men come back


If you’re asking, “Why do men come back after no contact?” There are so many reasons why men come back after breakup.

From feeling remorseful and wanting to build a committed relationship with you to getting revenge for being dumped, men have different reasons to reconnect with their exes.

If your ex wants to come back into your life and you’re sensing that his intentions are not pure, it’s best to leave that door closed.

However, if you still have feelings for him and your instincts tell you that he’s still in love with you, you can consider giving him a second chance.

If you choose to go down this route, keep your eyes open, take things really slow, and be extra careful because you could be dealing with a wolf in sheep’s clothing.


Recommended Reading:

14 Secret Signs He Still Loves You After Breakup

10 Obvious Signs He Still Has Feelings For His Ex

How To Tell If He Has Another Girlfriend

About The Author

Jennifer Dagi
 | Blog

Jennifer Dagi is happily married to her best friend and the love of her life.

As a relationship coach, she is passionate about helping couples build healthy and happy relationships.

She strongly believes communication and intimacy are the most important ingredients for building a successful relationship.

Join her on a fabulous journey to improve your love life one step at a time and don't forget to subscribe for weekly blog updates.

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